I think to myself:
You are not doing that right.
You’re coming off as a know-it-all.
Kids don’t love a mom who acts annoyed.
You always drop the ball with your husband.
You are being too selfish.
You are a continual mess-up.
God won’t bless that.
Condemnation. Like rain, it sure can pour down. Yet, somehow I have grown to think it’s an ordinary part of life. It’s like a fly in the house. Sure, it’s annoying, but I can deal with it. Sometimes, it even becomes familiar. Provided it doesn’t bother too much, we can co-exist.
But I wonder, how much does it hurt me to co-exist with condemnation?
Because when I think of it, I see that self-condemnation left unchecked…
leads to self-loathing and self-loathing left unchecked…
leads to self-inadequacy and self-inadequacy left unchecked leads to…
a fear-filled turned-in spirit that doesn’t turn-out towards God or others in faith.
Condemnation may not injure our current actions, but it sure impacts our future ones. It may not hold us back from dreams, hope and a future in the present, but it’s lasting effects do bite.
And yes, friends, I do know that God says, “There is no condemnation in Christ Jesus,” but sometimes I just don’t consider that in the moment – the moment when the thoughts move in as fast as a freight train.
Mostly, in that moment, I am just trying to get by, to live the hand of cards dealt – even when they leave me flushed with thoughts of how much I lack, what I can’t do and where I can’t go.
Sure, I hate those cards, but at the same time I am used to them. That doesn’t make them right though.
Yet, as I stare intently at those cards, wanting something more, my eye starts to focus on the King, the King who wears the crown. The King who is high. The King who can change the game.
I remember his love, I see his royalty and I admire his crown. I see something. I grab hold of something…
I realize the King’s love has already condemned condemnation.
Thinking of it in this way, allows me to grab hold of this truth.
His love is what changed – and changes – the game. And it is what changes my thoughts.
Let your eyes look directly ahead and let your gaze be fixed straight in front of you. Prov. 4:25
If I can keep my eyes fixed on what is love – Jesus – my thoughts will follow him. He will lead my mind in truth. The King will teach me the right way to go.
The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth what is evil; for his mouth speaks from that which fills his heart. Lu. 6:45
I know Jesus calls me towards obedience. I can’t help but think of this verse: take “every thought captive to the obedience of Christ?” 2 Cor. 10:5
I want to be obedient.
Next time, that hand is dealt and that fly buzzes, I am going to ask myself 3 questions:
1. How does Jesus see you in this moment?
2. Is this thought rooted from a place of Christ’s love?
3. Could I imagine Jesus speaking these words to me?
Perhaps, then, I can discard the things that trump his love and grab hold of the ultimate King of hearts. Perhaps then bad hands won’t be a precursor to bad actions. My eyes will be set on the King.
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Good brings good and evil brings evil – what will we choose? I love your three questions that you will ask to determine where the conversation in your head, heart is coming from. Jesus is our worth and His words are truth and love.
You speak from a place we all know and you have given us tools to use to walk this hard journey that we are on. I am grateful that you are heeding God’s voice in this. Have a blessed day!
Thank you Mary. It can be really hard to deal with these thoughts. I am so glad that God is higher, greater and stronger than any of these defeating words and thoughts.
Timely word for me, girlfriend! I’ve been battling that condemning voice since Saturday over a mistake I made. You know how the voice starts, “Someone who makes dumb mistakes like that shouldn’t be in ministry.” Then it just spirals from there. I feel like your post was just for me today:) Thanks for the encouragement!
I am so glad Kristine. God really puts messages out for specific people. I know, because I have been that person. Much love to you as you listen to the right voice, from the right King.
[…] Blessed to be linking up with Susan at #DanceWithJesus and Kelly at #RaRaLinkup. […]
I really never acknowledged that I am coexisting with negative self talk. This certainly explains why I am always waiting for the rug to be pulled out fron under my feet. I am going through a bit of a storm right now, but I am going to write your three challenge questions down as a prompt to defeat tbe voices that would keep me planted. Thanks Kelly!
I get you Samantha. If left unchecked it can be easy for it to go under the radar. I am praying for you right now and the storm you are going through. I am praying that God guides you in his ways.
Amen, you preach it sister! The King’s love has already condemned condemnation. His love IS a game-changer. Our thoughts influence our lives so much, but I like your 3 questions for testing our thoughts, especially #3: “Would Jesus say this to me?” I’ll try to remember to ask myself that!
Thank you Betsy. I am glad you enjoyed this. It’s such a good question to ask, right?
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The voices have been incessant these past few weeks. Thank you for reaffirming God’s truth in my life!! Have a wonderful week:)
I know Meg. It can be really hard. Listen to the voice of Jesus. He is speaking love.
Kelly,
I just love these words, they ring so true both Scripturally and in a human-heart, everyday-struggles kinda way. It isn’t just destructive to condemn ourselves, but disobedient to the King who condemned condemnation. Just love it!! Praying for your day to be one in which you live freely in His grace and love! : ) Thanks for writing and hosting!
Thank you Bethany. I am glad they ring true to you. Let’s bow down in obedience as we walk down his paths of love and grace. Love that.
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Looking ahead and asking those 3 questions…oh the places she will go comes to mind, Kelly!. And it’s The King leading that dance with you. Powerful image! You inspire me.
Thank you! Let’s look ahead and walk in love Susan. Cheering you dear one. I am dancing with the maker.
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Your words are powerful and full of truth, Kelly. I love that verse about taking every thought captive and making it obedient to Christ. To the extent that we are able to do so, and invite Christ to renew our mind, we will find the freedom He has promised us! I look forward to reading your posts, dear friend, thank you for sharing your heart.
Much love to you,
Kamea
Thank you Kamea. Let’s walk with minds fully surrendered to our King. Blessings to you.
I’ve definitely had those days where I have heard the voice of the enemy condemning me. Thanks for the reminder to replace those thoughts with the truth.
Yes Sandra. Those days come and normally we feel at a loss for how to respond. Let’s dwell on truth and love.
Such excellent writing Kelly- impressed. But more so impressed with your heart beating for His, not afraid to show your true colors while pointing others to the vibrancy of His love unfurled. Thank you.
Thank you sweet Katie. You encourage me so much. I find all of you to be such a delight. I am just sitting in awe of who God made you to be and wanting to grow in the love you outpour. Keep being you!
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Kelly, thanks for sharing! Encouraging for me! #RaRalinkup!
Love,
Tayrina from TGAWrites
You bet Tayrina! I am so glad you feel encouraged.
[…] I’m linking up with Kelly Balarie today on Purposeful Faith where she shares how to take bad self-talk to a Good God. (It’s so […]
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Such great encouragement today, Kelly! I enjoyed the lines, “It’s like a fly in the house. Sure, it’s annoying, but I can deal with it. Sometimes, it even becomes familiar. Provided it doesn’t bother too much, we can co-exist.” How often does condemnation become a familiar, yet destructive force in our lives. God has already condemned condemnation. We just need to remember that when the flies are buzzing around! Blessings!!!! Lisa Murray
Yes, Lisa. Let’s remember that. We need to shoo that pesky fly away! Done!
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My self-talk is just sad, frighteningly sad. “Yet, somehow I have grown to think it’s an ordinary part of life.” That is the scary part when it just becomes a part of life, when I quit questioning it. I absolutely love your 3 questions to ask, Kelly! I need to post those around my house :). Thanks for your encouragement, friend.
Candace, I know how that is. You are right. The normalcy of it is frightening. I think it is time we take a stand. Enough is enough!
Take every thought captive! Great reminder. I am so bad about negative self-talk. I want to be better. Jesus wants me to be better. This is a fantastic reminder to me. Thank you, Kelly, for being a fantastic cheerleader and leading us into a better knowledge of what Jesus wants for our lives!
It is all a process. I praise God that he is so patient with us. He will work things out through us as we do things through him. Let’s bring it all to him, Dana. Much love to you!
Those three questions! I’m writing them out and putting them near my mirror and my work desk… sticky notes sticky with His acceptance of me “just as I am” as the old song says. Another beautiful post rich with His riches, Kelly! Much love, thanks for the soul nourishing for my day 🙂
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Love is a game changer. Yes, indeed! Kelly, it was far too easy for me to relate to your post today. Condemnation and I have known each other in times past. It sounds as though we’ve both fought that battle. We’ll continue to encourage one another to keep our eyes focused right.where.they.should.be, on Jesus, okay? Have a beautiful day.
Oh, Kelly, I have been beating myself up so much and needed these words…your’s and God’s.
God created me as I am. He is growing me to be more like Him, so why…why do I say or think the things I think when I know better? Lessons are a hard sell sometimes, but I am a perpetual student and want to learn His ways for my life.
Praising God for you, sweet girl.
Caring through Christ, ~ linda
This: Jesus’ love is the game changer! Amen! And so thankful for it!
I praise God with you Ellen. We are so blessed.
Kelly, I began working on my post last night. Then I read yours and noticed we kind of talk about the same thing. I love how the Holy Spirit works in our lives weaving even our thoughts together. I’m so thankful for this #raralinkup and how each one ministers to others. We may not get to read all of them, but God uses each one in someone’s life. Thankful for you! xox
That’s great! I love how the Holy Spirit has themes to the linkup. I always notice it and I think it is amazing. God speaks to us all powerfully; you are so right Gayl!
Those are some great questions to consider first, when life is feeling a little crazy. Thank you for these encouraging words. I saw on Twitter yesterday that you were having some trouble with your blog- glad to see that everything is working again! I prayed for you!
Yes, when life goes mad, we know God is fully love. I am so happy God answered that prayer. I had a complete freak out moment. I realized how much I value the blog when it went down. Thanks Dawn!
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Kelly,
I am so glad that, through Abby McDonald, I have discovered your site and the wonderful women who meet here! It has truly been a blessing. I have learned through asking myself some of the questions you suggest, that the negative voice in my head is the enemy at work. Over time, practice and calling upon the power of the Holy Spirit who dwells in me, I have become much better at telling the enemy to take a hike!! Thanks for the encouragement I received here today!!
Blessings,
Bev
I am so glad too! Thank you so much for being a part of this Bev. It is a delight to have you. Thank you for your encouraging words. Let’s root out condemnation.
Kelly, this is incredibly encouraging. Our thoughts can lead us down treacherous paths. I love the questions you posted for us to ask ourselves, especially, “Could I imagine Jesus speaking these words to me?” Thanks.
Thank you Stephanie. I am delighted it is speaking to you and encouraging your soul. May you reside in the place of love.
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Oh my dear friend Kelly how I needed this today! Been listening way too much to condemnation and I’m squashing that fly tonight in Jesus name! Love you girl, keep cheering us on! Xo
Oh Holly. I know those thoughts and they are not easy. They are painful. Swat that thing! Done. Love you.
Kelly what a poignant questions – can I coexist with condemnation? I never thought of it like that. The answer would have to be no if I want the abundant life found in Christ. Thank you for the reminder “to take my thoughts captive” and think the way the King thinks about me.
Thanks Kia. Let’s be aware and try to root it out. Let’s dive deep into Jesus; he will make the difference.
[…] post is linked with two beautiful friends: Kelly at #RaRaLinkup and Meredith at Woman2Woman. You’ll be encouraged at both of their blog […]
Kelly, just linked up. God’s love TOTALLY changed the game. You are right sometimes it is so easy to let everything else creep in and not to trust in God. Yet the truth is we are seen. We are daughters (and sons) of the One true king. This One true king who put on the victor’s crown and overcame death and the grave. It doesn’t get better than that does it?!?!
You are so right Tara! It doesn’t. It’s done. I cheer this with you!
[…] friends. I encourage you to click on all these links and discover some beautiful treasures. Kelly Balarie, Suzie Eller, & Susan B. […]
I SO needed this, Kelly! Your blog ministers to me! Bless you, sister!