Purposeful Faith

Cutting Ties from The Need to Please

Cutting Ties

You live to make others happy. String.
You can’t be happy if others are upset. String.
You are burdened if you made a wrong choice. String.
You can’t disagree about life issues or opinions. String.
You feel responsible for how others act. String.

Ever wondered how to live life with no strings attached?

For so long, I have walked like a shoe with warn down treads and strings wrapping me. These strings seemed to both keep me together and squeeze me. They seemed to be known and detested at the same time. For so much of my life, I would tie these strings up and say, “I just care a whole lot, a whole lotta lot about people. I would give everything for them and to them.”

The only thing about strings so tight like that is – they squelch the very person wearing them.

When we give everything to everyone, we really become a no one to everyone.
When people seem to control our every move, we move into places of anxiety and fear.
When we don’t have a way, we allow others to define our way.
When God is not making our way, we lose our way.
When we hand over our identity, we live insecurity.
When we live insecurity, who lose all surety.
When we are at the beckon call of man, we find ourself far from the peace an’ call of God.

Have you ever considered that being an over-giver is unhealthy?

Have you ever pondered how eyes on man divert eyes from God?

For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ. Gal. 1:10

I am considering all of this. Deeply. Meaningfully. Carefully.

I choose to seek the approval of God.

With this, here is what I have come to:

1.  I can’t help another, if I haven’t given God a full chance to help me.
2. I can’t control the environment of happy, peace and calm by telling others what to do.
3. I can’t make others see, do or say what I need them to in order to keep me balanced.
4. I can observe a situation or happening without making it declare me bad.
5. I can give space and grace rather than side glances of judgement and disappointment.
6. I can be free to be me, when I trust it is God, not man, that will take care of me.
7. I can say that I am beautiful, when I stop believing man thinks I am not.
8. Others opinions belong to them, not me, and I am not any less for their correct or incorrect assessment.
9. God wants me tethered to him, not tethered to ties that keep me stuck to the past, emotions or fears.

So, take that strings! Take that, because I am cutting you!

The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe. Prov. 29:25

For each will have to bear his own load. Gal. 6:5

But just as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel,
so we speak, not to please man, but to please God who tests our hearts.
1 Thes. 2:4

strings unleashed,
movement unknown,
plans uncontained,
life unrestrained,
unmoved by the shaking,
but uncovered in the trembling,
Trekking towards the once declared “impossible”,
yet moving all the same,
to the place where surrendered feet stand on holy ground,
God’s ground,
the place where you know all will finally be okay.

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Kelly, a fun-loving, active and spunky mom of two rambunctious toddlers, spends her days pushing swings, changing diapers and pursuing the Lord with all her heart. Called a "Cheerleader of Faith", Kelly's greatest desire is to help women live passionately, purposefully and unencumbered for the Lord.

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13 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Strings of words woven together to make sense. Well done Kelly! I like this because…yes…I have felt ‘strung out’ before. I have learned to say no to things that do not suit me; i pray more about what to accept in terms of commitments. Happy almost new year! Merry Christmas.
    Jenn, FMF neighbor

  • Oh, Snap! : ) I’ll cut these with you…just have to find them all (that can be the hard part sometimes…). Thanks for this, Kelly! #Faith-FilledFriday

  • If I didn’t know better, I’d think that you have been overhearing my prayers lately. So many strings, all of them good, and important and all of them seeming to be “necessary.” I’m praying or grace to sharpen my scissors in 2016!

  • This is very good! Especially at Christmas time I find myself trying to please everyone and coming up short so often. Thanks for these good thoughts and reminders today! 🙂

  • Perfect! Love how you tied this all together. Christmas is about celebrating the One who came to deliver us, free us, and loose us from a life of bondage… no strings attached.

  • Kelly,
    This post really hit home…I continually struggle with not being able to control the acts of others…particularly that of my grown children. They are too big to put in the corner for a “time out”. But, then, who am I giving my allegiance to – the eyes of man or the eyes of God. I need to cut that string of “what does the world think?” It’s of no earthly good to me or my children. Thank you for a very thought provoking post. May you have a blessed and joyous Christmas, Kelly!
    Bev xx

  • Wow. This is a great reminder. Thank you. And so many things reminded me of things I need to let go o your reference to strings also reminded me of a marionette…the actions are dictated by movement of the strings there is no personal control until the strings are cut

  • I have been trying to cut my strings for years. They’re like the mole in the hole game sometimes! Thanks for sharing so I don’t feel alone in this struggle. I’m joining you from #dancewithJesus linkup

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