There are people I do not share my hard times with. Of course, I share these times with you all! I love opening up to you (plus, you all listen so well). Thank you for being amazing. Thank you for all the prayers you’ve prayed over the years. I pray for you too.
But, like I said, there are people I don’t share with. Why?
The people I don’t share hard stories and deep emotions with, tend to:
– turn the story back around to themselves, ignoring my heart issue.
– put down what I have shared, telling me, “That’s not a big deal.”
– immediately go to advice-giving.
– spread my story to other people.
– judge me when I am talking.
– not empathize or show any compassion.
Unfortunately, because I repeatedly give unsafe people the benefit of the doubt — I’ve gotten hurt, repeatedly. After a lot of hurt, one must learn. Wise people use discernment in what they share and with whom they share it with.
Have you been hurt by people’s responses too?
“Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.” (Mt. 7:6)
I forgive people, for they know not what they do — and, usually, they are really trying their best. I take responsibility. I cannot continually go to a well that does not have living water flowing from it.
At the same time, it makes me think — how do I respond to people?
– Am I quick to listen and slow to speak?
– Do I reserve judgment?
– Do I stay calm and patient in the process of their sharing?
I can’t say it is always great (especially with my kids). I too, need help in the “truly-listening” department.
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” (Ja. 1:19)
A few words can make a huge impact. It is not the wisdom that I carry; it is the heart that God wants us to bring.
What if I were to listen from the heart? What if we were to be the safe people? How might God use us?
Prayer: God, help me! Help me to be quick to listen and slow to speak. Help me to ditch anger, for love. Father? I also forgive those who have dissed me when I was sharing. I let them off the hook. Give me wisdom in whom to share with and whom not to. I love you, always and forever. You are my King! You are Lord! You are my everything. In Jesus’ name. Amen.