Purposeful Faith

Tag - love

Fear Fighting: Like You Never Have Before (+ Special Invite)

If someone asked me a year ago who I was, and I was brutally honest, I’m not sure of my response. There’d be too much garbage to tell them.

All of these answers could have been true:

I am a life agonizer. I see my to-do list in the morning and then get spooked by it. I have this dreadful feeling I’ll never get everything done I need to. Suddenly, I see the family without laundry, my kids without dinner and my life swooshing down the drain.

I am an endless worrier. Every accident, incident and ailment is just on the verge of happening. I imagine a neighbor’s cough will leave me flu-ridden. I think a chair will leave my daughter’s head crawling with lice. I think my husband’s mistimed call means he’s gotten in a highway accident and will flat-line in ten minutes.

I am a constant doubter. I read the bible in the morning, I say my prayers at bedtime and I know what truth sounds like, but often I lose God when mini-catastrophes hit. I freak out – and then freak out, because I just freaked out. I forget that I am forgiven and live criticizing and condemning myself – over and over again – in my head.

I am a defensive blamer. If she has an opinion, I have a reason why my way is 100% right. If she has too many opinions, I start to believe she thinks I am stupid. If she disagrees, I think she is against me. All of this is – her fault.

I am a sizer-upper. If I see you dressed well, I decide, I look like a trash truck exploded on me.  If I see you with great gifts, I think my gifts serve no purpose. If I see you succeeding, I hate you for it.

I am a controlling dictator. I tell my kids when, where and why – and expect them to move in line formation. I notice what my husband is doing wrong and then jump all over him for it. I get scared things won’t turn out well so I set rigid standards to keep things in my realm of comfort.

I am an avid-fretter. I remember the past and thinks it disqualifies me from good in the future. I see opportunities and decide they intimidate me too much to seize. I have a general sense in me that God isn’t happy with a woman as faulted as me.

A year ago, I was a walking nervous wreck. You would have had no idea because on the outside, I looked primed and mascara’d. But, inside, my heart wore a frown and my nerves wore an electric current, set so high, it made me sizzle with anxiety. I wanted more. I was tired of feeling tired and over feeling overwhelmed.

This is when I realized, God didn’t create me to live in panicked misery, he created me to live as a Fear Fighter.

This is why I wrote the book, “Fear Fighting: Awakening the Courage to Overcome Fears.”

Writing this book, with God, changed the story line of my life. Now I can declare, through the Spirit of the living Lord, I have found my path to freedom: I am a Fear Fighter.

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. 2 Cor. 3:17

A Fear Fighter is a woman who pursues a life where, she is both, a victor and an overcomer!

A Fear Fighter is a woman who knows who God created her to be.

A Fear Fighter is a woman awakened to his greatest callings.

A Fear Fighter is a woman armed with strategies to beat the enemy’s defeatist tactics – on-the-spot.

A Fear Fighter is a woman who knows how to beat her heart palpitations by the power of pointed prayer.

A Fear Fighter is a woman who applies truth to her fears like an oxygen mask to a barely breathing life.

A Fear Fighter is a woman who is equipped with heart-calming courage-building habits.

A Fear Fighter is a woman who learns to step past her deep tremblings so she can walk sure-footed into God’s glorious callings.

A Fear Fighter is a woman who is not perfect, but who sees perfect Jesus – personified, in a way where she trusts his strength.

A Fear Fighter is me. Thank you, God! A Fear Fighter is me!!!

I don’t have to claim every fear is abolished. That wouldn’t be honest, but what I can claim is that I know how to fight what is coming against me. I know how to win when I used to wrestle for weeks. God has delivered my heart, much more, to lands of calm and clarity, peace and purpose, love and liberty.

Will you join me? To continue fighting, I need sisters like you with me. I need women willing to band together. Willing to live out the Fear Fighting journey with God. Willing to read the book. Willing to be loved. Willing to move closer to Jesus. Willing to pull in other sisters paralyzed in fear. Willing to move this movement out.

Fear Fighting

Pre-Order Fear Fighting here.
Shed fear and draw near to God.
Fight like a girl who knows God has her back!

In other exciting news!!! We’re putting together a launch team! Actually, I’d rather call it an overflow team. Sure, we will all be sharing, posting and Amazon reviewing. This will be a great part of it, for we are leading downtrodden women to the well of Jesus’ healing. This matters and it matters BIG. But, while we do this, we will most certainly breathe in and exhale the fullness of freedom, rather than the bondage of to-do’s. This is my hope for the team.

If you’re interested, you can join sign-up here. We’ve got only 200 spots (and 200 free copies of the book!) and would love to have you. We’ll get a lot accomplished in this group, have a ton of fun at the same time (including giving away some fun prizes as a thank you for your help!) and we’ll have tons of encouragement for you too. Make sure to sign up by November 17th! You can do that here!

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When Your Good Intentions Fail

Good Intentions Fail

In order to put on my ski clothes, I had to tug on long johns. Then, I’d layer super-tight, hard-to-get-on socks. One after another, I’d put everything on until my legs felt like they were the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man. Only then, would I pull on my snow pants, the final covering that prevented all cold water from entering the warmth that was under the coverings.

There was a process to the putting-on. I couldn’t just start and end with the outer shell of snow pants. If I did, I’d go through the night freezing.

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.  Col. 3:12

Compassion. Kindness. Humility. Gentleness. Patience.
These are great things. We run after them. Daily we attempt to put them on, don’t we?

I know I do…

I wake in the morning and tell myself, today, I am going to be compassionate and kind. I am going to speak gently and tenderly to my children. Two minutes later, I blast them. Their faces look plastered with shock at my poorly chosen words. Sorry?

I also whisper to the Lord, “I am humble. I want to walk in low places with you.” Ten minutes later, I think, “I could have done that ten times better.” Whoops! 

I try to move towards gentleness and patience, saying, “Watch out world!” Halfway through the day, I am tapping my toe and giving the evil eye to the car that’s moving at a snails pace.” Go figure.

What God calls me to put on – falls off halfway through the day.

Ever noticed this happens to you? Every wondered why?

I’ve noticed, I put on the shell of good acts, but what lays under is empty. Underneath, I have not layered myself up, with God, so I can endure the cold times of my day. This discourages us. It causes me to think, “I can never do this Christian faith thing,” “I will always fail” or “There’s no use for me.”

Do you feel like there is now hope for you too?

Like try you may, but you will always fail?

What if we have it all wrong? I can’t help but think, God didn’t just tell us to “do”, there is a whole other component – a component I often forget about. Take a second look at the first part of that verse above: “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved…” (Col. 3:12)

First things first, friends.

Embracing the goodness of God, lets you live the goodness of God.

To feel embraced, you must layer up:

Layer 1: You are chosen. God picked you. He wanted you. He will use you. He has plans for you.

Layer 2: You are holy. His hanging on the cross, earned your holy status. Nothing can remove that from you.

Layer 3: You are dearly loved. You are loved from above and even when you act dumb, still, you are loved.

As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance… (1 Pet. 1:14)

As ones internally covered with God’s garment of grace, mercy and love, like children who need what God has, let us draw near to God’s warmth, so we may go to the cold places of the world.

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How Many Christians Live Grace All Wrong

Grace All Wrong

“Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.” Ephesians 4:2 (NLT)

Easy, right? Hardly.  This is just about one of the hardest callings.

Imagine:

You toss potato salad at my face? I smile and speak in an angelic tone to soothe you.

You throw me under the bus with my boss and steal my promotion? I make allowance for your mistake and let go.

You con me out of all my money? I humbly confront you with words of kindness.

How is this possible?

Not by my own strength, I’ll tell you. My own strength would have you pressed up against the wall with a lesson stuffed down your throat. It is not easy to respond with humility, gentleness, patience and allowance for mistakes.

In fact, it’s pretty much impossible.

All our righteous acts are like filthy rags… (Is. 64:6)

It’s impossible by our own strength because we are weak. We either muster up humble-arrogance, which looks a whole lot like pious Christianity, or brute force, which ruins relationships.  Either way, the result is not from God and it’s quite ugly.

…For it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose. Phil. 2:3

God works in us and God wills us to act out his good purpose. God moves then we move forward in love.

Yet, I often live backwards-grace. This is where I muster up good within myself and force it on the world. It usually ends up looking a whole lot like manipulation rather than ministry. Yuck.

Backwards-grace is fruitless. It leaves Christians dejected, demoralized and discouraged. It flat-out doesn’t work. What does work is getting with Savior. Seeking his heart. Letting him mend yours. Allowing him to grow you. Returning again to the wealth of his truth. Letting his grace cover your failings. And then, from the place of heart-change, allowing that very shift, within you, to work kindness, patience and humility into the world.

If you let God into your heart, you’ll find he changes it.

Create in me a clean heart, O God, And renew a steadfast spirit within me. Ps. 51:10

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Grace for One Who Self-Condemns

Self-Condemns

I sat in the car, head down and thoughts heavy.

I can’t get things straight with this person.  I seem to bother them. I seem to aggravate them. I seem to be a burden on their life.

She who feels condemns condemns.

Have I been condemning?

The thought pressed closer to my chest, piercing my heart. Does their lack of approval regarding me, act like a boomerang,  and move right back on them?

They seem irritated, so I get irritated because they are irritated and we stand at an impasse. They snap at me, later, I fear they’ll do it again, so I use a harsh voice. They don’t listen. I come down hard and demand to be heard.

Anger at myself settles. Once again, I’m the problem. I hate that feeling and its abysmal return.

She who is beating herself up can’t heal another one up.

More anger at myself settles in.

She who is not freed by grace can’t free others by grace.

More anger at myself settles in, except with it also comes the thought that if I really want progress, I really need to accept grace. Not just accept it in a way where I wear it on the outside, but instead, wear it, internally, like a stint that keeps the oxygen of my life flowing. One that keeps my heart beating and moving in ways that are transformational and life-giving to be both me and others.

Therefore let us [with privilege] approach the throne of grace [that is, the throne of God’s gracious favor] with confidence and without fear, so that we may receive mercy [for our failures] and find [His amazing] grace to help in time of need [an appropriate blessing, coming just at the right moment]. (Heb. 4:16 AMP)

I am welcome to walk right up to God’s grace; I can approach the throne of grace with all confidence and no fear. When I walk up to it, I need not think, I will be turned away, but I may just know mercy will be mine. It will be mine for every failure and it will work for me in my time of need. It will be an “appropriate blessing, coming at just the right moment.” I like this.

With this, I may approach this person differently.

Grace lets me move forward with imperfections and with room for my mistakes, faults and failures in Christ Jesus.

God’s love removes my need for a defensive spirit.
God’s mercy covers my guilt with new life.
God’s forgiveness is not something I should feel shame for receiving.

I am being developed into this likeness of Jesus and this takes time.

What might grace, seized with confidence and no fear,
look like in your life?

What form might God’s – “appropriate” and timely blessings  –
take as you make space for them?

My heart is called today to be a grace-getter. Do you know what a grace-getter looks like?

It looks like a person who shoves fear down a ditch, then runs up to the foot of the cross. She waves her arms and says, “Hey God, over here. My ways aren’t working so well, God.  I need you to relieve me of my pain.”

She who gets grace –  gives grace.

She knows, in her time of need, God has things covered and the blood of Jesus is just enough.

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What’s Blocking you from Christ?

Blocking you

The boy stood there. Between him and the time of his life – was glass.

blocking you

To move on to new adventure, he had to let go of reservations and fears and find a way around what stopped him. He had to submit to Father’s way, so he could find his way. 

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Often we get stopped. All the same, we peer out, uncertain about how to proceed, how to claim joy. We see the barrier – our fears, rejections and worries.

God doesn’t see barriers. God sees perfectly. He sees us. He sees our way. It’s crystal clear.

What is holding you back? Stop, and really consider this. It could make all the difference to your life.

Are you proceeding with the God
who removes barriers?

Or are you proceeding straight into a glass window
that gets you nowhere?

Here’s a quick test to tell…

Do you think:

  1. With God, all things are possible. He will do what he will do, but no matter what he will get me through.OR
  2. I’ve got to make a way or I’ll be left and standing here watching my dream take-off. I’ll be forgotten and worried and never to be loved.

We need add nothing to the perfect work of God.

Have you been adding stuff?
Stress? Anxiety? Plans? Opinions? A controlling spirit? Doubt?

 I consider myself a know-it-all on this subject matter, for good reason, I bang my head on the window of my own self-preservation, self-seeking and self-righteousness all the time. But, here’s the kicker – when I do, when I actually turn around to find him –  He is there. And, I find joy.

Mercy abounding, he waits. Love untainted, he restores his daughter. Grace unfolding, I access new hope.

He gives me a one-way ticket to new adventure and calling in Him, when I finally “re-turn.”

Do you feel too far gone – to get back?

Let me remind you of something important: the perfect Savior saves the imperfect people. This is the bottom line of the gospel.  That’s me! That’s you!

Even more, the perfect savior empowers imperfect people. Imagine that!

That’s me! That’s you!

All that is required is, us, simple folk, like lost prodigal children, just “re-turn.”  No shame about this friends, every disciple had to do it.

Will you?

God breaks the glass standing between us
and Him when we let him.

The weary get rest.
The tired get blessed.
Anxieties are less.
There is clarity to see.

Where we believe we could never go, God takes us. It isn’t by our efforts, for there was no way we could climb over the issues ourselves, but – with God – he can do it.

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How to Find Rest in God

The girl was acting bad in church. I couldn’t help but notice her. She jumped around, like a pent up puppy, giving no attention to the pastor. I apparently was acting bad too because I kept on watching her. She was cute. She didn’t much care for brother though, and with this, Mother shoved her over towards daddy…

To give you some background, I’ve felt unsettled lately. Unsettled in my mothering that seems a bit too intense. Unsettled in this adventure called book and how God will use it. Unsettled by people who have let me down. It feels like a bad cough. These feelings of insecurity rise up as a hinderance to faith. I feel it coming, I hate it too. Yet, I know there’s a cure.

Daddy picked her up and held her. Immediately her head rested on daddy’s shoulder. She looked to the side in a daze. Instantly, her arms that wrapped around him fell. Daughter relaxed. She became a wet noodle fresh out of a massage – all aggression, agitation and irritation vanished in the arms of her Father.

I watched closely. It was interesting. Nothing had really changed. She was still in the same place. She was still just as bored. She was still the sister of the brother that drove her nuts. She was still very much in the same problem she was 2 minutes ago, but actually, everything did change.

She was in daddy’s arms.
Her eyes closed.
She was nearly falling asleep.
Simply because she knew she was safe.

Loved.
Cared for.
Adored.

Do you know this?

You can relax. What is bothersome, burdensome and back-breaking is soothed by the power of love. It is love that pulls you close. It is love that holds you with arms of protection and dedication. It is love that will never break or fall or grow weary of your bad antics.

Perhaps you need to know today you can fall into the arms of a daddy that will not hurt you. You don’t have to resign yourself, any longer, outside of his arms because you are on the blacklist or because you are a bad church-goer. You don’t have to keep him at an arms-length because you are the the ugly step-child or because you are a failure.

Daddy’s pick up daughters. It is as simple as that.

great daddy

In this place, there is no worry of what annoyances are around.
There is no focus on things that are about to ruin you.
There is no attention to the ways you’re life is breaking apart.

There is just – Him.
You.
Covered in affection.
Filled with security.
Embraced without requirements.

I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Is. 41:10

Have you trusted daddy to uphold you in his arms?

The cure to worry, insecurity and the silent jury in your mind, is getting unhurried as you lay in the arms of God.

I know this to be true. Me – the most unsettled of all unsettled people, finds refreshment in the deep-reaching arms of the father.

Daily, I fall there and fail there and it is okay. He accepts me. He accepts you to – in such a powerful way, you can let go of everything and just rest, body fully relaxed, in the arms of his love.

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When Your Picture Is Not Pretty

Picture Is Not Pretty

I saw the truck driver out of the side of my eye from the sidewalk. He was unloading boxes. I shot him a side-smile, halfway knowing he’d get a kick watching me position my kids just right. It was going to be the Fall picture of all Fall pictures, mostly because the backdrop looked autumn-genius – pumpkins, mums and hay looked like artwork. C’mon, this was it! I balked at the beauty. Truck-man didn’t smile back; he just glared.

So, when he approached me, I got scared.

“Do you want to be in the picture with the kids?”

I sized him up all wrong.

You can’t measure a heart in a split-second.

Here he was: a good man breaking out of his timeline of delivering food to deliver us the perfect picture. I appreciated it. Did he know how badly I wanted things to feel perfect? How I wanted my kids to experience the warmth of this season? How I wanted them to see the colors and value in change? How I wanted to know – and remember – I was a good mother?

This picture, I imagined, would be the ones the kids gathered around. It was going to be me- looking cute and them – looking happy. It was going to be me – bringing them places they would love. It was going to be them – full of joy.

No one was going to forget it. Pictures are memorials of good times. And, random picture-takers are angels.

I shoved daughter up on the hay. She hated it. I pushed her up on a pumpkin. She toddler-cursed the seat. No matter where this angel-trucker stood – left,  right, center – I sighed, there was just no money shot. Daughter was done with it. So was I.

Why is it whenever I try to orchestrate good, it goes bad?

And, why do good acts of service so often fail?

Not only did I feel let down, but I felt like I wasted someone else’s time. I burdened him for nothing. Guilt arrived.

What is your dream shot?  Maybe it looks entirely different than expected?

Maybe you look odd? Less than? Or, maybe you feel guilty for wasting people’s time?

Embarrassed? Or, scared, even?

Sometimes, things just pan out – weird, ugly and wrong. And, what you’re left with are images blurred, skewed or haphazard. Ones that catch you with your eyes closed or with a double chin. They show the hatable things.

…The LORD does not look at the things people look at…  (1 Sam. 16:7)

What we look at worthless, God calls worthy…

Our picture is earthly, but God’s is eternal. So, while we see a snip-it, God sees more. He sees past the clothes, the facades and the faces, straight to the heart. He sees all the images lined up, like framed pictures on a wall going up the stairs. He sees our growth, our progress and our love expanding. The pictures please him.

We can’t always see from his view. That’s our real problem…

We don’t see much. We see the here, the now, the tears and the Pumpkin-fits. God sees the gallery in the Museum of his Faithfulness. He sees how the image of mourning gives way to joy 3 steps ahead. He sees how the grief gives way to gladness a couple feet beyond. He sees how mayhem will work itself into peace when his love develops.

You have turned for me my mourning into dancing;
You have loosed my sackcloth and girded me with gladness...  Ps. 30:11

Today,  I am encouraged to know beyond the externals, God cares far more about the picture of the internals.
I am encouraged to remember there is a vision to the pictures of my life.
I am encouraged to focus my lens on eternity.

With the filter of eternity, in this picture I see:

  1. We are all fighting to find our seat in life.
    Sometimes we just need another to come behind us to say it is okay to not know because God does.
  2. There is no perfect picture unless you zoom in on Jesus.
  3. What appears like a bad shot will be glorious, tomorrow.untitled-design-19

And, with this, I smile and know – that picture I took? It is a memorial. It’s a marker of imperfection, an image of my growth and a pointer to the glory that awaits. I’ll hold it close and look back on it fondly.

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Remembering Jesus

Remembering Jesus

If the man sweat, I’m convinced, it would’ve come out as iron. He was strong! No doubt, he was military. I tried to keep my eyes straight, but to no avail, they wandered like a girl cheating on her 11th-grade chemistry test. I didn’t want to get caught – pastor was going strong. Still, how the man rubbed tenderly and passionately his bracelet, over and over, round and round – it meant something. I needed to know what.  The sermon, this day, was all about him.

I squinted and spotted a location and a date. Aha! I figured it out. They are winning moments. Times, people, places that were special, meaningful or momentous.

As his fingers moved,
did his mind also, going back to the memory of what happened?

A place where he joined hands with a fellow warrior and pressed on?

A time when his courage nearly beat out of his chest – and he conquered all?

A lesson of bravery, learned through trial, never to be forgotten?

How sweet! “Hold on to that fella,” I wanted to say, “that’s what moments are made of.”
If I could’ve whispered it without being rude and out-of-place, friends, I might have.

The paint was chipping, kneaded raw, but clear as day I spotted three letters: KIA.

At first, I thought of the car brand – KIA.  Then, I the reality appeared:

KIA. Killed. In. Action.

My eyes widened.
Killed. in. action.

My back sank down the chair.
Killed. in. action.

My heart moved with it.
Someone willing to pay the ultimate price for freedom.

This man? He knew: You hold on to one you love. You knead into the fact they gave up their needs and wants, so you could have yours. You absorb the price of their sacrifice.

The man next to me did just that. He remembered…

Him, a person, laying down his life for liberty.
Him, one suffering all pain, for our gain.
Him, a beating heart, a heart he knew, silenced.

Do we remember Jesus Christ in the same way?

Keeping the reality of his sacrifice not only within our fingers,
but everpresent within our heart?

Our warrior, the perfect warrior – Jesus – with his final breath beat death, sin and the war of all evil. He is worthy.
Our Jesus lion and lamb, burst free of the tomb. He is worthy.
Our Jesus, who sits at the right hand of the father, won the battle, so he could plead on our behalf. He is worthy.

Jesus was K.I.A.

Because of the lamb, who is also the lion,
we are now forever liberated, loved and alive.

Do you hold him close? Do you knead into his goodness? Do you remember the power of his miracles worked into your life? Do you draw from his words and wear them, like an embossed memorial, across your heart?

Today, hold close: Jesus. Died. For. Me.

Goodness, purity, wholeness was killed, willingly, on your behalf.

“This is my body, which is for you; do this in remembrance of me.” 1 Cor. 11:24

Jesus. The man who had it all, but gave it all – for you. R.I.P.

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When It’s Their Fault

Their Fault

I sang and danced and swirled and twirled. I had no care in the world. I paid no attention to my foot caught on the hem underfoot or my strap halfway down my young arm. None of that mattered. What mattered was that I felt alive, beautiful and one with creation.

their fault

What happened to that little girl?

The one who gave no care to her off-pitch high notes?  The one who heard not catcalls of criticism, but simply her voice of freedom? The one who gave no merit to outside perceptions, but just God’s wild affirmations?  Somewhere along the line, she got buried.

It’s always easy to blame others, They broke me.”

They broke me with pointed words, “What’s wrong with you, Kelly? Wake up, you self-absorbed one.”
They injured me in ways that people don’t talk about over coffee.
They pointed out my big nose, loud voice and my bouffant hair.
They made it clear I was destined to be a loser.

In school, I remember things. We all had a papier-mâché project. You put a little something in your balloon, you’d shove in a little figure of sorts, then blow up the balloon. After that, you’d add doused paper on top – lots of doused paper. You cover that balloon right up, layer upon layer. The balloon got hard.

I am like that balloon – 3-inches covered by guilt and shame. You too?

Their Fault

“People stole care-free from me.” I yell to God.

Do not conform to the pattern of this world,
but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.  Ro. 12:2

God speaks to me,
“Kelly, you can relive the past in your mind
or you can renew your spirit with my mind, the mind of Christ?

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Half of me is so accustomed to assigning other people blame for my pain. It’s hard to turn away from a comfortable seat well worn. But, the other half of me realizes if I want to be new, if I want to get up and go, I’ve got to turn another direction. I want to believe it is well with my soul.

I close my eyes. Can I find her? The liberated, dancing singer?  

I know she’s under there, under the fortified covering of papier-mâché, somewhere…

God calls me friend.
God names me, daughter.
I am his love.
The very pursuit of his greatest affections.
A layer of paperweight peels off me…

He sees me, my beauty.
He writes my name on his hand.
He cuddles me in feathers.
He’s my bodyguard, ever-protector, forevermore.
The balloon is seen again…

He leads me.
He unveils his master plan for me.
He tends to my soul.
He teaches and transforms,
molds and makes me,
helps me.
The balloon pops…Bang!

And that little figure? The one tucked deep away, inside the covered balloon? It surfaces. I finally see it. Except there’s one thing I notice, that strikes me – funny. The figure looks nothing like me. It looks like Jesus.

As I strip off the layers that cover me, I see – Jesus, the very power of God, living in me.

I find who I am, through the great I AM.
I release my potential through his power.
I reignite my passion as I draw from his paternal love.

I never needed people to approve me, but Christ to move in me.

But because of his great love for us, God,
who is rich in mercy,
 made us alive with Christ
even when we were dead in transgressions…(Eph. 2:4-5)

God brings me back to the heart of who I was created to be. What love, I loved, he loves. I see this when I realize I am alive with Christ.

their fault

When I grab his hand and let him take the lead, he leads me to still waters, to new hope and to a new dance that sings his glory.

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Have You Lost Peace?

Lost Peace

I am delighted to have Susan Pettrey from Brooklyn Tabernacle join us. Susan is a tremendous force for the Lord. She is used in ways, I know, she can’t even begin to imagine. She has impacted my life through prayer. It is a pure delight to welcome Susan today for Women’s Ministry Monday.

It was another night of going through the normal bedtime routine I have with my 6-year old son, Levi. Something was wrong.  It had been for days.  He was unusually hyper, unfocused and distant from me. I knew why.

We had recently moved to a new neighborhood, and within the past month, Levi had to adjust to a new home, school, peer group and, even, a new nanny.  It was a lot.  It would be for any child, but Levi is adopted and, as I’ve learned, adopted children intensely crave security.

I can only imagine what goes on in his little mind as he tries to process the implications of his adoption and life, but it was no mystery that all of the recent changes were creating extreme anxiety in his heart.

As Levi jumped up and down on his bed, I decided that a reprimand was not what was needed at that moment.  Levi needed to be ministered to.  I asked him what was bothering him only to be given his typical response of “nothing”.

The more I probed the more Levi tried to change the subject until, finally, I said, “Honey, it’s very clear right now that you don’t have peace in your heart.”

With that, Levi got quiet and waited for me to continue telling him what he couldn’t find the words to express himself.  I did my best to validate his feelings. Then, I encouraged him with words of hope.

I told him that I knew God had led us to this new home and, so, we could trust He had a plan. It would be for all of our good.

He laid his little head on my chest. I could feel his body slowly begin to relax.  It was as though my confidence…or peace about Levi’s life and future was transferring into his own heart.

We prayed together. I kissed him goodnight with an assurance that his anxiety had subsided.  I was grateful for that moment and thanked God for it without realizing the deeper truth He was going to teach me.

When I opened my Bible the next day, this is what I read- “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” John 14:27

As I pondered the verse, God showed me my exchange with Levi was just a dim reflection of what He desires to have with me.

So often, when life has been difficult and seemingly out of control, I’ve prayed for more peace.  As if the process involved God giving me the power to muster up my own peace in the midst of my troubles.  But, now, what Jesus was saying became so alive to me as I remembered my experience the night before.

Just as Levi received my peace as his own,
so Jesus wants to give us HIS peace.

When we were saved, God’s Spirit took residence in us.  Our old man was put to death and, now, it is no longer we who live but Christ who lives through us.  How often I forget the benefits that come with this great truth.  I don’t have to be a better “Susan” anymore.  All I need to do is look to my Savior who longs to give me everything He is.  Not only does Jesus want to fill me with things like His love, His strength, and His wisdom, but He desires to fill me with HIS very own peace too!

Not a peace that is manufactured by me or dependent on imperfect people or an unstable world. It’s a divine peace rooted in the one, true God who has all authority over heaven and earth.

It’s a supernatural peace that can never be moved or shaken by the circumstances of life. It’s a peace that comes from the One who knows how the story really ends.

Whatever the challenges we might be facing at this moment, Jesus invites us to lay our head on His chest and receive His peace today.

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Susan Pettrey’s Bio

img_8712_2Susan Pettrey is the second daughter of Jim and Carol Cymbala, who pastor the Brooklyn Tabernacle in Brooklyn, NY.  Susan grew up witnessing great moves of God and His power to change the most hopeless of lives.  As an adult, Susan has been all over the spectrum of ministry at the Brooklyn Tabernacle.  She has served as a worship leader and soloist in the choir.  She is the director of the women’s ministry, as well as, the BT Drama Company, where she writes and produces full-length plays that are used to minister to the church and evangelize her city.  Her greatest priority, however, is her wonderful husband, Brian, and four amazing children, Luke (19), Claire (16) and Levi (6) and Charlotte (1)