Author - purposefulfaith

Father’s Day Note: You are a Great Daddy

June 18, 2016

You do things.
You get me coffee.
You clean the pans that have scum left from the night before.
You give me time to execute my dreams.
You love your kids.
You give them your best.
You think about how I am feeling.
You encourage me in my dreams.
You tell me I can.
You show me you care.
You make sacrifices and time.
You give me the best Apple computer a writer could ever want.
You think about what I will delight over…

…all while being daddy of two, leader of home and strong at work.

If there is one thing a woman wants, besides God, chocolate and new clothes – it is a man that loves her. I have that in you. You are mine and I am yours. When I see you, I see Jesus.

If there is one thing a kid wants, besides candy and toys – it is a daddy who cares.

You make breakfast a coveted affair.

You lug them around on your shoulders.
You tackle and toss and take your kids places they have always wanted to go.
You laugh and dance and fuss over little things.
You bring little gifts home from work.
You make time for stories.
You pray morning and night over things that count.
You take them on new adventures.
You do breakfast tours in new cities.
You make your minutes count.

They know.

And what I know is all these small moves of love, will end up as giant leaps of the heart kind. They will know significance. Believe in it. They will know belonging. And rely on it.

They will know they can because daddy always believed they could.

They will believe Father Daddy will carry them because you did.

They will know Jesus because you reflected him.

She will find a good man because you are good man.

They will remember. They will remember the “You are courageous” comments. They will remember the “Don’t give up,” words. They will remember the, “Spin for me” requests. She will remember the, “You are beautifuls.”

You are sowing security. You are making it the fabric of our family, the knitting of our future. It counts. It will reap rewards.

We cheer you today, daddy.
You are a man doing well.
Working hard.
Giving your all.
We applaud your generosity, your heart and your passion – for us.

Love,

Wifey and Kids

P.S. From your little boy: Daddy, I love you, daddy. You are strong. My heart feels glad to be with you, daddy.

P.S.S. From, your even littler girl: Daddy, you make me feel happy.

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Seeking Your Fame Over His Gain

June 17, 2016

purposefulfaith

blessings, Contentment, expectations, faith

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I was checking to see how many Twitter followers I had. It was just a few seconds of distraction, a few seconds of indulgence, but seconds that cost me so much.

I glanced around the room for my 1-year-old daughter. She was nowhere to be found. I called her name. Nothing. I furiously looked around the room. Nowhere. My heart skipped a beat. Anxiety welled up in my chest. There are so many things that can happen in just seconds. My mind raced. The possibilities overwhelmed me.

Then I heard it—a thump, thump, thump. My worst nightmare was becoming a reality. Something was happening to my baby. I heard her falling and ran as quickly as I could muster to the most dangerous spot in the house—our stairs. I saw her at the bottom, crying. My heart broke.

My distraction led to this infraction.

My preoccupation created a situation.

My online enjoyment led to her torment.

How do you find that what you seek online—pleasure, satisfaction, fun—leads you away from God and others? What we do in a matter of a few seconds can have long-lasting repercussions. What makes us feel good or accepted can make others feel the exact opposite: denied and rejected.

As I hugged my crying baby girl, I realized, it was time to turn away from Google and Facebook to think about how I was impacting others. It was time I look at what and where I invest my heart.

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it” (Proverbs 4:23).

“Put me on trial, LORD, and cross-examine me. Test my motives and my heart” (Psalm 26:2).

God, what do you want to show me about my heart?

I was DISTRACTED.

I was distracted from the presence, the place where God shows off. Usually, I love to see my daughter’s new milestones, but, this time, I didn’t get to see her climb those stairs. I missed that moment.

When we immerse ourselves in a screen, we miss the in between.

I sought AMUSEMENT above all.

“Entertain me! Delight me! Consume me!” That is what I say so often to my screen. Give me a moment of joy in a world that aggravates me.

God speaks differently, to me it sounds something like: amusement comes and amusement goes, but my love remains forever.

“For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations” (Psalm 100:5 NIV).

I wanted my FAME above his.

Read my posts. Like me. Favorite me. Retweet me. See me. Accept me. Do you notice the theme? Me. Me. Me.

When we focus on self, God goes on a shelf.

“LORD, I have heardof your fame; I stand in awe of your deeds, O LORD. Renew them in our day, in our time make them known; in wrath remember mercy” (Habakkuk 3:2 NIV).

What desires does your heart seek? They extend far beyond a screen, I assure you.

“For he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things” (Psalm 107:9 NLT).

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How to Overcome Temptation: 4 Ways

June 15, 2016

purposefulfaith

Contentment

I was tempted. I was tempted to look at something online that I knew was very, very bad for me to look at. I wanted to look so badly. I wanted to see. It was like a little box I could open in secret.

That box is thrill…I stared at it.

And between me and that momentary treasure, a finger seemingly popped up, beckoning, “Come here, Kelly, what harm is there in the looking?”

Who will it hurt?
How much does it matter?
No one will know.
You can decide when to stop.
God knows, you aren’t perfect.
It won’t really hurt.

Except it does – hurt. I have done those things before, I knew I shouldn’t. It always hurts. It hurts like a platoon of bees in attack mode. You see, because even if it is the smallest transgression, even if it is one I can easily write off – it follows. It chases.

It chases saying…
“You little failure.”
“You horrid little mess-up.”
“You will never get things right.”

It leaves you nauseous, like that huge slice of cake you knew you shouldn’t have downed at midnight. Blah.

You feel sick. Then you run. Far. From God. Fast. Maybe inadvertently, but still, you do. Because you want to hide under your bed, so he can’t see you anymore. You don’t want him to see your shame.

Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden. Gen. 3:8

When you turn your back on God,
you become convinced God turned his back on you.

He never did, though.
He never will, though.

He can’t.

“I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Heb. 3:15

God is with me, even when temptation wants to beat me.

Father was with Jesus, even when devil tried to tempt him.

If only I can remember this.

Perhaps, then, I might be able to do these four things:

Look for God’s way out for me.
When you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. 1 Cor. 10:13
Pray and ask him to make this different way apparent.
…knock and the door will be opened to you. Mt. 7:7
Identify the lies that are leading me to want to sin in the first place.
I can ask, “What am I seeking to fill that only God can?”
Find scripture that relates to this heart issue and let it consume my mind. I can speak it, repeat it, hold it and pray over it until it becomes sturdy within me.

Temptation has no power when you say no.

And, when all else fails, I can confess and convince my heart to run back into daddy’s arms. He waits. He waits not with hands on hips, head cocked and an exasperated sigh, but with relief that we are reunited.

He wants me back, even when I have turned my back. He wants you back too.

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When Someone Is Better Than You

June 14, 2016

purposefulfaith

approval, Comparing, Contentment, doubt

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I have this thing that I promise myself, “If I keep my eyes on God, I won’t end up far from God.”

This is actually a battle mottto, because no less than 100 times a day, I have to fight to keep the forces of my mind moving in tandem with it.

Kids go haywire. Battle.
Someone speaking things that threaten me. Battle.
Anxiety creeping in. Battle.
Girl disses me. Battle.

One thing, I always promise myself not to do, is to look at other people’s journeys and compare them to mine. I know this is the equivalent of shooting yourself in the foot. Suddenly you can’t get anywhere.

The blessing you believe is yours turns black, tainted. The progress you felt you were making looks like lint. The value that God places on you resembles a jail jumpsuit, lettered: CAPTIVITY.

Comparing is the quickest way to go about killing spiritual progress. It really is.

Suddenly, you believe you are:
A. Never going to get anywhere.
B. Never, ever, going to be as good as that other girl.
C. Going to fail, so you might as well pack it all up now.

Comparing is a kid on Christmas who only sees the one toy he didn’t get and sissy did. It is his red scrunched up face that glares at – he misses the 19 others wrapped goodies intended to bring joy.

Maybe you are like me saying, “Whoops! That is me. What do I do now, God? “

Friends, I want to offer you a solution here, but let me tell you, I’ve never been that good at giving myself the benefit of the grace (my inclination is to give myself a smack on the face).

I had a friend who knew how to love herself with grace. She got shunned by a boy, she said, “Oh, he is busy.” She had a teacher be rude to her, she said, “Oh, she’s having a hard day.” Me? No. He hates me and she is about to fail me.

Thinking of this friend, though, it inspires me. She lets love – love her.

When it comes to comparing, I am not unliked by God, nor deemed the bad child, but am the selected child. Hand-selected to impact the world in my own way. Hand-selected to dwell in his love. Hand-selected to minister to my family around me.

He is paving a way for me; that only I can walk through.

He is doing the same for you.

Just opening that small door of grace, let’s new ideas walk in:

People can succeed and I can too.
God has enough to go around.
Every woman’s journey is different but equally as important in God’s eyes.
God cares far more about big faith than he does about big progress.
What is good for her, can be good in me too, as I applaud her.
No one has the power to subtract joy from me unless I let them.
God’s singular mission carved out for me – is mission critical in his eyes.
I am always approved, no matter how much my feelings may disapprove my work.
I am not the sum of accomplishments, I am a testament Christ’s love.

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2. Have you found any great writing tips online? Linkup on the page – the Best Writing Tips of 2016. Let’s all help one another hone our craft.

3. Join the Cheerleaders for Christ Facebook page for continual writing encouragement.

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The Good in the Bad

June 13, 2016

purposefulfaith

Contentment, doubt, trials, Troubles

Today, I am overjoyed to welcome Shanelle Wagner! Her words speak encouragement and life. Shanelle is the Women’s Ministry Coordinator at First Denton Church. Shanelle, we are thankful for you and everything you do! Keep trekking into your calling.

Post by: Shenelle Wager

Are you seeing a storm full of no’s, changed plans, erupting conflicts and sideways suggestions?

Maybe you are beginning to think, “This is not what I signed up for? Did I make a mistake, a wrong turn? What is going on? Am I cut out for this? I’ve done something wrong, I don’t have control.”

God brings us to situations that are more than we can handle alone, so we can depend on Him.

James tells us to consider it joy.

I used to roll my eyes in unbelief and run from this idea, I just couldn’t’ wrap my mind around how the bad should make me joyful…but He has been patient with me, gently pursuing me.

And this is what I’ve discovered: God is faithful to work in these types of downpours.

These bolts of doubt, waves of no’s, changed plans and conflicts test maturity. They indicate where you are. They are not used for the purpose of shaming, chastising or catching you. On the contrary, they are because he cares for you. Because He is about to take you to the next level.

He lets you see where you are weak, so you can see how to be strong – in Him.

Now, if you fall and revert back to your old ways, don’t panic. He has more work to do with you to strengthen you for the next level. One thing I have come to learn, though, is he loves cooperation and willingness (Example: bible study, confession, accountability, recovery group).

I believe, it is all worth it, for what you find is: the testing proves out – your progress.

Ever noticed this? When you see progress, it offers a confidence a boost.

God is preparing you. He does this for the ones He sees and loves. The ones He has specific plans and purposes for.

This is you. This is me.

Hanging on. Trials can certainly leave you empty and ravaged.

3 Ways to Keep the Faith in Storms

1. Fix your eyes on Him, know who He is and believe His truths. (2 Cor. 4:16-18). Remember you are not alone. He sees you and all you are experiencing, He knows. Let His peace comfort you.

2. Cast your cares on Him. To cast something you must first hold it, look at it, perhaps name it, then you can cast it at His feet (1 Peter 5:7). Know He is with you, sit with Him, and ask Him to help you name the struggle and what is going on inside of you. Tell Him why it bothers you and how it makes you feel, act, think.

3. Trust what he is doing with the no’s, changes, and interruptions (Prov 3:5). Thank Him for the good. Thank Him for the sun in the sky. Thank Him for the drive thru that offers you a hot drink on a rainy day. Just thank Him for it all. Thank Him for the work He is doing that you cannot see or understand ()1 Thess.5:18.

God can be trusted to complete the good work He begun in you. He is there in the storms.

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About Shanelle

Shanelle is a wife to a super supportive husband, who happens to be her best friend and biggest cheerleader in life. She is also a mom to two young boys. Shanelle entered vocational ministry when her oldest was a toddler and her youngest came along 17 months after that. She has been learning the ropes of ministry and motherhood simultaneously. Shanelle will tell you that both are the hardest jobs she could ever love. Shanelle can tell you many stories about Lord’s faithfulness all along this journey! Her days have truly not been her own…even though She confesses to wrestling Him weekly for them. She will tell you of His is graciousness and patience while she has learned to let go and let him…. work everything out for His purposes.

Shanelle has personally lived out Proverbs 16:9 and 2 Corinthians 12:9, He orders our steps and He is strong in our weakness. She has had to depended on Him to show her every step to take, and there have been times many, many times where anything that was accomplished was not of her own strength, but His. Shanelle continues in her role as Women’s Ministry Coordinator at First Baptist Church Denton, while enjoying the abundance of giggles, cuddles and love with her family.

Does God Really Care about Me?

June 10, 2016

purposefulfaith

Contentment, faith, fear, Freedom, purpose

Normally I think about all that I am not.

I am not as good as the other girls with big, bright and shiny blogs.
I am not going to ever climb out of my own thoughts that hold me back.
I am not able to succeed because (insert some sort of limitation here).
I am not that great of a mom, I get frustrated too easily.
I am not close enough to my extended family.
I am not going to end up in a good place in that unknown future.
I am not going to end up with good results even if I try hard.

Why bother?!

Ever feel that way?

Then, I come up against God speaking these words to Moses: “I AM WHO I AM.” Ex. 3:14

God speaks with power. And, Moses is a man I like. I imagine him trying to do enough and be enough for his people. I imagine him, like me, probably not feeling all that great – and a whole truckload of doubtful that he’ll really succeed.

To stand against the heat of God’s fire like this – these words would shake me to the core. Not only because I hit up against the blazing hot power of God, but also because they mean something – and do something. They purify insecurities.

I AM WHO I AM.

He is who he says he is.
He will be the one he claims to be.
He is who he is.

These words give me confidence. Because often I tend to think, unknowingly, of the “God who is not”.

The god who is not coming through for me.
The god who is not keeping me happy.
The god who is not showing me all the time his ways.

I can try to hide these feelings under the guise of good-girl Christian (which always drops me off at the word – hypocrite), but I get somewhere when I turn to God and ask, “God, am I really good enough for you to take care of – dysfunctional ol’ me?”

He replies, “I AM WHO I AM.”

He is who he says he is.
He will be who he claims to be.
He is who he is.

He is – is good.
He is – truth.
He is – power.
He is – strength.

The devil says who I am not, God says who I am.

Flesh says who I can’t be, God says who I will be in him.

Shame says I am bad, God says I am loved.

Lies speak demise, God says, “Rise.”

Will I believe?

God doesn’t waver. He is not a man that he should fall and skin his knee, he is a king. He doesn’t erase the cross of grace, he died on it to secure eternity for us. He doesn’t delete the signature of our name from his hand, he holds it close to his heart that always beats for us. He doesn’t take back is callings for our lives, he predestines them for us.

He sends us out in unerasable truth:

And Moses said to God, Behold, when I come to the Israelites…What shall I say to them?

And God said to Moses, I Am Who I Am and What I Am, and I Will Be What I Will Be; and He said, You shall say this to the Israelites: I Am has sent me to you! Ex.3:13-14

He sends us out in his love, power and armor. It moves us forward.

Every single time he is at work to bless us.
Every single time he is at work to pave a way for us.
Every single time he is at work to make us more holy.
Every single time he is at work to work in us.
Every single time he is at work to draw us closer to power of his love.

I AM WHO I AM.

He is who he says he is.
He will be who he claims to be.
He is who he is.

Will we believe – He will do what he said he will do?

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How to Imitate Christ – 20 Ways

June 8, 2016

purposefulfaith

Contentment

And you should imitate me, just as I imitate Christ. 1 Cor. 11:1

Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you Eph. 5:1-2

These verses both intrigue me and scare the beetle juice out of me. Trying to be like Him- it is no joke. It takes some ability. It takes some power. It takes some mojo. I don’t know if I have it.

Normally, when I stand right up against a large goal like this, and see it towering over me, I nearly freeze at its immensity. I duck down and curl up fetal position. Tall orders make me shake, freeze and prepare to fail. I fear them.

Do you?

In business, the only way I ever accomplished anything of importance, was by breaking it down into daily chunks. It was by tackling it in a way where it was so small that it was possible.

So, when I think of imitating Christ, rather than seeing the big picture (to look exactly like Him), I consider how to break it up in smaller ways, so that 40 years down road, I surprise myself and land at “project practically completed.” Small things – I can do.

Even more, I step back and consider – it is only through grace, through submitting, through praying and through experiencing God’s love that I will ever arrive at destination massive. This also relieves some pressure. It helps me get ready to go.

Now that we moved that out of the way, how do we really imitate Christ?

What does it look like to be him, rather than us, insecure messes of selfishness?

20 Ways to Imitate Christ in Your Daily Life

1. Ask.
Why are you terrified? (Matt 8:26)

2. Wait.
Now Jesus himself was about thirty years old when he began his ministry. (Lu. 3:23)

3. Sit down.
That day Jesus went out of the house and was sitting by the sea. (Mt. 13:1)

When Jesus saw the crowds, He went up on the mountain; and after He sat down, His disciples came to Him. (Mt. 5:1)

4. Pray.
One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God. (Lu. 6:12)

5. Praise.
At that time Jesus said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. (Mt. 11:25)

6. Go.
Jesus went throughout Galilee, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the gospel of the kingdom, and healing every disease and sickness among the people. (Mt 4:23)

7. Be kind & forgiving.
Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. (Eph 4:32)

8. Be humble.
He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. (Phil 2:7-8)

9. Fight back.
Jesus said to him, “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only.'” (Mt. 4:10)

10. Seek holy.
As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance,
but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior; (1 Peter 1:15)

11. Expect suffering.
For you have been called for this purpose, since Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps… (1 Pet. 2:21)

12. Lay down love.
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. (1 Jo. 3:16)

13. Know his words.
Whoever keeps His word, in him the love of God has truly been perfected. (1 Jo. 2:5)

14. Fear not the poor, ugly, dirty or crazy types.
While Jesus was having dinner at Levi’s house, many tax collectors and sinners were eating with him and his disciples, for there were many who followed him. (Mark 2:15)

15. Be a uniter, not a divider.
Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. (1 Pet. 3:8)

16. Seize faith.
Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done. (Lu. 22:42)

17. Fight flesh, surrender to Spirit.
But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires. Ro. 13:14

18. Die to your needs, live for others.
We are to walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma. (Ephesians 5:2).

19. Give what people don’t deserve.
Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” (Luke 22:34)

20. Know where you are going.
For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day. Jo. 6:40

And when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the unfading crown of glory. 1 Pet. 5:4

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Broken Perfectionism

June 6, 2016

purposefulfaith

awe, blessings, Contentment, doubt, dreams, faith, fear

I could not be happier to have Angela Craig joining us today for Ministry Monday. Angela is on fire for the Lord; her passion exudes from her (and I have only talked to her online, so this says so much!). She is a gift sent by God to this world and I am excited to honor her here today. Welcome Angela!

“A dangerous leader is one that has great familiarity with their skills and gifts
but cursory knowledge of their inner brokenness.”
– Dan White, Jr.

I will admit it. I want everyone to like me. The two things I have struggled with most of my life are people-pleasing and perfectionism. In the past, if someone didn’t like me or critiqued my work, I would spend an unhealthy and disproportionate amount of time lamenting on where I went wrong. Then I would make a plan to fix it. The problem was, no matter how hard I tried, I still disappointed people and made mistakes.

It could be because I am human. As far as I know, human beings can strive for excellence but they can never be perfect. Having the hope of perfectionism is like having a boat with a hole in it and thinking you can stay afloat if you can just keep the water out of the bottom. Eventually, you will take on more water than you can bail out and get tired of trying to fulfill other people’s expectations. This leads to burnout or drowning. Neither, a good option.

But what if I was perfect? Would everyone like me then?

Actually, the answer is no.

Listen for a moment to this story of Jesus. On Palm Sunday, Jesus made his triumphal entrance into Jerusalem on a humble donkey. The people were so enamored by Jesus they lined the street with their cloaks and palm leaves in honor of who they believed to be the next royal King from the line of David. Jesus could do no wrong. Five days later, that same King hung on a splintered wooden cross with a crown of thorns on his innocent head – naked, accused, mocked, beaten, hated, and judged – but still perfect.

As the story ends, we see it was obedience, not perfection that changed the world forever.

As leaders, it is easy for our interactions with others to become performance driven. We can become actors on a ministry stage. Our actions being guided and directed by audience approval and recognition. If left unattended, the approval and recognition of others will eventually affirm or challenge our identity and self-worth, leaving God’s opinion back-stage.

We must maintain the ability to embrace our gifts, God’s words, and our brokenness at the same time. For me, a broken perfectionism has been the path to being a healthier leader.

You are unique and distinctive. Your leadership matters. Live fearlessly for Jesus today, my friends, and be encouraged by these last scriptures and a quote from Brennan Manning. I will be here cheering you on!

Brennan Manning wrote: “God loves you without condition or reservation and loves you this moment as you are not as you should be!
Real freedom is the freedom from the opinion of others. Above all, freedom from your opinion about yourself.”

“Man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart” (I Samuel 16:7 NIV).

“Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ” (Galatians 1:10 NIV).

“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God” (Ephesians 2:8 NIV).

About Angela Craig

Angela’s 10 years of international speaking experience covers leadership and women’s conferences, non-profit events, and on-line leadership training. Angela is the Director of the women’s department at the Northwest Ministry Network where she has the honor to lead a team who is responsible for the development and empowerment of female leaders in over 320 churches. Angela is an ordained minister and a certified coach with Gallup Strengthsfinder, SLTA 360, and AGC. A life-long learner, Angela has a Ministry Leadership degree from Northwest University and a Master of Arts in Organizational Leadership from Gonzaga. Angela is honored to teach as an adjunct professor at her alma mater, Northwest University. Angela is also the founder of the GIVE GOOD Awards Foundation, an organization that recognizes inspirational people and promotes volunteerism.

Devoted to helping others reach their fullest potential in life and leadership, Angela has authored two books, The Story of Leah: When life is not what you expected it to be and Pivot Leadership: Small Steps – Big Change . You can read her weekly blog encouragements and leadership tips on angelalcraig.com and on hervoiceblog.us, a blog specifically designed for women in leadership.

Magnificently Inspiring Faith Manifesto

June 3, 2016

purposefulfaith

blessings, Contentment, faith

Faith Manifesto:

Walk around arms-wide-open – life passes, you want all God’s good stuff to land in your arms along the way. Grab truth, everything else is living a lie. Listen more than you talk; it is how you get to see Jesus. Seek to understand and you’ll realize the world’s about a whole lot more than – you. Walk in the valleys of humility and you’ll see how mountain-reaching your great God really is. Worry less about who will run the country and remember that Jesus rules. Let critics criticize, but let Christ’s love pulverize their power – over you. Pray like everything in life depends on you, but know your cares just landed on the to-do list of God. Trust that God isn’t just going to give you your good, but he is going to give you his great. Be happy when things don’t turn out as you thought; God has a better plan. Don’t be held back by looking like a perfect picture, grab Jesus’ hand when you look horrid. Suddenly, you find, you look beautiful. Let the waiting rooms of your life, be exchanged for praising rooms – it is God’s training space of outpouring grace. Be like a child – adults make faith too complicated. Lay down against the cross; it will remind you that life’s pains wane in the face of eternity. Seek justice, don’t lose the opportunity to fight for what is right. Love mercy; let others know how great it feels. Seize compassion. Let it fly. Hunger for truth and wave it like a flag. Turn towards God again and again. The face of Jesus is found everywhere – in cranky kids, cantankerous folk, careening cars, chirping creation and quiet moments. Know Jesus stands right with you – you need only see. Confess when you feel far away; God wants you to recognize his love again. Don’t lose the opportunity to spend every day hungry for more. At the end of your days, you want him to look at you and say, “Her. I knew her.” It will make you jump up and down. Until then, be not afraid, for His throne stands close. Walk with the confidence that only the Holy Spirit can give you. Rely on it.

3 Ways to Emotionally Win Arguments

May 31, 2016

purposefulfaith

Contentment, failure, faith, fear

7 Comments

I didn’t want to do it, but there I was stuck right in the center of my kitchen, in the mess of it. I leaned in, my temperature boiling, this woman just was not understanding my point.

“There’s no changing a mind like hers,” I thought, “She’s impenetrable.”

I glared. I guess, God was going to have to teach her the hard way – and I was certain I wasn’t going to be praying blessings over her life anymore! Take that!

She is not understanding me. She is hurting me. This is all her fault.

Isn’t it funny how we think? We can even know our thinking is faulty, that we are some small iota in the wrong, but still, we grab onto our small point as if it is a helicopter dropping down a life-line. We think it will get us to battle won, but we usually much more feel like it is battle done as we are left stranded at the top of a building, waving our hands. Helpless. Uncertain. With no one around to fix our aching heart.

Her words approached me strong. Her defensiveness writhed. So did mine, for that matter.

Do your arguments go round and round making you feel like the loser?

Do you start to look at the person like enemy rather than friend?

Usually, I figure, the other person:

Will never listen.
Doesn’t care enough to listen.
Doesn’t get me.
Thinks wrongly about me.
Is always going to win.

Just admitting what you believe about the other fighter is helpful, I find. Lightbulbs go off.

Lightbulb 1: When you’re in mindset – self-protection, it is easy to go into mode – manipulation.

^“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” (1 Cor. 13:4-7)

I don’t do all that. I do other things in the heat of battle; I injure.

Admission and confession offer permission for God to move in.

Lightbulb 2: Love is not me, it is God’s presence in me. The pressure is off.

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” (2 Tim. 1:7)

Reading this verse makes me want to create a little plaque I hang over my kitchen sink, saying: No fear needed, for with love, I am equipped to win.

This means I stand in the center of the kitchen-tornado with:

1. Power – Christ’s power in me; it does not look like a weak girl getting pummeled but like a force of peace.
2. Love – I have the supernatural power of Jesus Christ; he will help me forward it on.
3. Self-discipline – The ability to know when to speak and when to shush up. I have power to have power over myself. I am not without strength; God made me full of it – in him.

I keep on remembering these 3 things as I am talking; It makes a difference.

I am not without, I am with God, with his grace, with his arsenal of mercy. This is not weak, it is strong. This is not flailing, it is thriving. This is not anger, it is progress.

Lightbulb 3: If Jesus didn’t condemn me, man can’t either. I can always operate from a place of intentional love rather than injured fear.

Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. Jo. 3:18