Purposeful Faith

Category - Contentment

Finding true contentment

Your Invitation to be Shameless & Fearless

stress less

(*Stay tuned for the invitation at the end of the blog post…)

___

I shouldn’t have said that. What’s wrong with me?

Have you ever wanted to rewind time to take back your words or actions? The second these words came out of my mouth, I regretted them. I didn’t do a good job. I shouldn’t have said this.

Ever been there? Have your past words, actions or mistakes ever come to life to plague you? Is it hard to let the past go?

In my situation, my husband overheard my whole conversation from the other room…

“What did you think? Did I do horrible?” I asked him.

His non-response and unenthusiastic answer said it all… “You gave it your best shot.”

My best shot?! I knew what that translated to: I did horrible. Absolutely rotten and horrible. I botched it up. I should have done better. Ugh.

Everything in me wanted to either hide, run, or freeze. I wasn’t sure what to do, all raw and exposed, probably, much like this biblical woman of old…

“The religion scholars and Pharisees led in a woman who had been caught in an act of adultery. They stood her in plain sight of everyone and said, “Teacher, this woman was caught red-handed in the act of adultery. Moses, in the Law, gives orders to stone such persons. What do you say?”  (John 8:3-5 MSG)

“Jesus, what do you say about…
this woman — the embarrassing mess-up?
this woman — the horrible one?
this woman — the guilty-as-charged person?
this woman — the bad, bad, girl?”

The woman stood there. Waiting. Crickets.

“Yes, Jesus, what do you have to say about her?!”

“When they kept on questioning him, (Jesus) straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” (Jo. 8:7 NIV)

All condemnations that wanted to stone her — were silenced. All accusation that wanted to pelt her — was stopped. Jesus set her free, called her to sin no more and she walked away, liberated — an entirely free woman. Jesus did that. He still does…

I wonder, are you free from the stoning of condemnation or are you still being hit? Are you free of yesterday’s baggage or are you still carrying it?

“So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” (Jo. 8:36)

Friends, I still have moments of shame, for sure. But, one of the greatest miracles of my life is how shame — and fear — don’t rule me anymore. Through biblical ways of thinking, practical postures of heart, and authentic moments of prayer, God has freed me from mountains of shame and fear.

I feel He wants me to share my learnings, with you, so you too can walk free…

So, I am doing a 2-part, Breakthrough Workshop Event

De-stress during these Two Breakthrough Workshops, as we:

  • Identify the areas of condemnation, critique, or accusation that are limiting you.
  • Gain 5+ biblical, practical strategies to defeat shame, condemnation and fear in its tracks.
  • Share vulnerably and authentically with women who understand.
  • Receive releasing-prayer for new-found freedom in Christ-Jesus.
  • Discover proven-ways to maintain a fearless and faith-filled heart.
  • Renew your mind in biblical truth to live the abundant life Christ died for.

Sign up today.

***Plus, the Psalms have blessed me so much! The verses David have changed my heart and mind. You know? David was a man after God’s heart; allow his perspective to change your hearts. Registrants will also receive some of may favorites prayer-declarations from Psalms.

2 Days & Multiple-ways to Attend (via live/recorded ZOOM):
1. Live Breakthrough Workshop 1 (Practices to Defeat Shame) – Sat. Feb 5, 10:00 AM -11:45 AM ET
2. Live Breakthrough Workshop 2 (Maintaning Fearlessness) – Tue. Feb 8, 6:30-8:30 PM ET
3. Recorded version  – Both events will be sent post-event.
Register now!

The morning retreat cost is $19. I lowered the price (while covering costs), to help as many people attend as possible!

Testimonials:

“My life is changed.” -C.A.

“Kelly is a great encourager! Her greatest desire is that you should know who the Lord created you to be and who you are as a daughter.” – M.R.

“Kelly brought light into my very dark world by demonstrating what the true love of Jesus looks like!” – D.P.

“Kelly’s “realness”, no matter the cost has helped liberate me from all the masks I carried. Christ uses her to powerfully deliver freedom in every conversation.” – S.A.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Will there be a recorded version?
Yes. You do not have to attend “live”. I will send you the file post-event. For more information or if you have questions contact kelly@purposefulfaith.com
2. How will we have the meeting? 
The event will be hosted on Zoom. Please check your Zoom account for updates prior to the event. Lines will be muted.
3. Can I invite my friends to join this or is it only for Purposeful Faith readers?
Everyone is welcome! Forward this email.
For more information or if you have questions contact kelly@purposefulfaith.com. Ticket non-transferable/refundable.
Subscribe for all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

The Huge Mess I Found Myself In

I never knew sparkles could do so much damage…

Well, I take that back. . . I did know that sparkles could do damage, which was part of my stress to begin with. I didn’t want sparkles all over my house and in every floor crevice and stuck deep in the dark recesses of my rug. I didn’t want sparkles tracked everywhere by my shoe and stuck to my hair and dangling off my eyebrow, but lo and behold, this is exactly what happened.

The second I got home from being out, my kids implored, “C’mon mom! C’mon mom, craft-time.”

I wanted to say, “I need a few minutes. I need to pray; sparkles stress me out,” but my son was already dumping the pint-sized jug of sparkles on the table. And, there I was — wanting to be the best mom I could be.

Ignoring my insides, I dove in head-first, “Okay, kids, here mom comes.”

At the table, my insides were throwing a tantrum: It’s going to be a mess. The table will be ruined. The craft time won’t be fun.  And, worst of all, what if these crafts end up looking horrible and none of them sell at my kids craft show?

The idea of a big-, horrible-, icky-mess was plaguing me. And, frankly, I didn’t know how to control it, fix it, or manage it — while sparkles began to get dropped outside the foil, then on my white dining chairs, then into the glue pile that was supposed to have no sparkles in it if we wanted the other ornaments to look good.

Everything. felt. completely. out. of. control.
My insides were anxious.
I started barking orders.
My kids were having no fun.
My son went to his room and said, “Maybe I should just do the crafts with dad.”
And, my whole idea of fun — went kaput.

Inhale. Exhale.

Friend, like me, are you ever afraid of messes? Does the idea of mess ever create stress? Does the stress tend to make a bigger mess?

Galatians 5:1 says, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.”

Christ already won my freedom. Yet, the second I start worrying about things being perfect is the second I yoke to stress.  It is the fear of messiness actually welcomes anxiousness. Any obligation where we rely on man rather than God becomes a burden, not a blessing.

I can’t enjoy sparkles with my kids when I fear mess. I can’t be armed up in prayer, when I feel obligated to be ready at man’s notice. I can’t enjoy the moment, when I’m fearing the outcome.

How do you need to let go today? Are you seeking to control something or someone? Or, are you afraid of feelings you can’t manage?

You know, Jesus entered the mess of this world to save the likes of you and me. He wasn’t so afraid of the mess, that He couldn’t enter in to it. While we were yet a sinner, Christ died for us. He sees everything we face. He is not as afraid of it, as we are.

He has an answer. He has a door of escape. He is a ready-help in time of trouble. What if we were to turn towards Him and ask for all the grace we need in our times of trouble?

Maybe, then, we’d throw sparkles up in the air and dance under them!

Prayer: Father, I am letting go of ___. I can’t do it alone. I need you. Help me. Give me grace, abundant grace. Show me the way. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

 

 

Losing Something or Someone You Love

stir it up

I lost a brother in Christ today.

I so badly wanted him to live. I prayed while he was in the hospital. I hoped from my bedroom. I fought with deep words and loud cries. I believed he would remain on Earth, but, this morning, I got a text saying…

“He passed.”

My friend is gone now.

This sits heavy. Life is short.

The veil between here and there is thinner than it appears. We never know our time. We never know when the curtains close here. Yet, when a loved one faces death, it’s a stark reminder to us who live — that the only time we have  — is now! Right now. This very moment is a gift from God and the fact that we have it is HUGE.

This is our moment on His grand-stage. Heaven watches (Heb. 12:1). There is a purpose to our existence. Our words matter. Our love matters. Our prayers matter. This is our time to impact the world for Jesus. God assigned us to this hour, in this season of His appointed world. He has a plan and a use for our existence. We are not just bidding time, or wasting away until our crossover day; there is His will to see forth. There is His pleasure to attend to. There is His glory to cast.

You know, I can’t say why my prayers didn’t get answered as it pertains to my friend, only God knows, but I do know this — God still answers prayers and faith still moves mountains. There’s no arguing about that. God is true and His Word is more truth than my thoughts. Period.

Maybe some of you have lost someone or something… Maybe some of you don’t know the why’s or the how’s… Maybe some of you feel a heaviness about what didn’t happen…

God knows what He is doing.

Sometimes our theology need stop right here. Eve (of Adam and Eve) tried to figure out the whole world and the details of not only evil, but also of good, as she bit that apple — and look where that got her (and all of us for that matter…)?

We don’t always have to know. But, we can know this: we serve a good God.
We don’t always have to understand. But, we can continually stand under His grace.
God is good to one and all; everything he does is soaked through with grace.” (Ps. 145:9 MSG)

God is good.

“Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!” (Ps. 34:8 ESV)
The safest place for our searching heart is under God’s care.

These days, it’s easy to get caught up in — should I use this bow or that for the Christmas wreath? Should I get this gift for the kids? Oh, what horrible news there is online.

My dear friends, this world is like a mirage. But, one thing remains, God — along with faith, hope and love. These will never pass away.

“Now we see but a dim reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love; but the greatest of these is love.  (1 Cor. 13:12-13)

This season, let’s press past the mundane and into something more transcendent and everlasting…faith in God and His character, hope that He is who He says He is and love for all those around us. These things will not fail us. They produce no regrets in life, well-lived.

Faith, hope and love are the wisest life-investments we can make. They last.

And, as it pertains to my friend? He was full of these three things — faith, hope and love. This I know — He is not lost — He is a BIG gain to heaven.

Prayer: Father, fill us with faith to trust on you, to believe you and to trust your character. Give us hope, like we have never had before. Even more, we want to love you and others in wild and incredible ways. We ask for you to fill us with your Holy Spirit so that we may gush forth the fullness of you, everywhere we go. We thank you that we are alive. We thank you that you have good plans for us. We lean on you today. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

How Much Thanks Matters

I nearly remember standing on that shiny car dealership floor next to my dad. I turned to him and said, “Dad, can I?”

“If you want this car, you can have it, Kelly.” He said.

I jumped up and down and up and down. It was the car I always wanted! It was a convertible! It was amazing! It had red leather interior!

Now, it wasn’t my dad buying me the car. So, I put as little down as possible and took on debt for as many years as they would let me, but, at least I had it!. I had the car I always wanted! I could ride in the warm California air with the top down, hair flying. I’d feel free.

When I rode in that car I felt like a million bucks — for a week. Then, after that, I felt like a hundred dollars for a time, until the fanfare wore off and it was just any old car.

You know, they say those who win the lottery are happy at first, and then, not so much later… Why? Because they adapt to their winnings — and what felt fresh and fanciful before, loses luster.

Have you ever been there? Have you ever gotten something that you always wanted, but then it  lost its wonder? Did it hold power and then lose value in your life?

If I’ve come to anything, it’s this: anything, apart from Jesus, nothing really satisfies, at least, not for the long run. But, Jesus? He will fill every part of us, He will quench thirst, He will satisfy every longing, if we let Him…

For instance, in John 4, Jesus met a someone at a well. This woman was from a different class. She was a Samaritan. She was searching for something, although after five husbands she still hadn’t found it.

“Jesus said (to her), ‘Would you give me a drink of water?’ (John 4:7-9 MSG)

The Samaritan woman, taken aback, asked, “How come you, a Jew, are asking me, a Samaritan woman, for a drink?” (Jews in those days wouldn’t be caught dead talking to Samaritans.)” (John 4:10)

Jesus answered, “If you knew the generosity of God and who I am, you would be asking me for a drink, and I would give you fresh, living water.” (John 4:10 MSG)

“The generosity of God.”
If we knew the generosity of God, we’d ask God for what we thirst for.
If we knew the generosity of God, we’d ask — being prepared to receive.
If we knew the generosity of God, we’d ultimately find the refreshment and gratification we’re looking for.

What a concept!

“Knowing the generosity” of God — provokes our asking — then, we posture ourselves for receiving the very thing we long for.

This is further evidenced in the Luke 17, the story where 10 people got healed and only 1 came back to thank Jesus…

“Then one of them, upon seeing that he was cured, turned back, [c]recognizing and thanking and praising God with a loud voice;  And he fell prostrate at Jesus’ feet, thanking Him [over and over]. And he was a Samaritan.

Then Jesus asked, Were not [all] ten cleansed? Where are the nine?

Was there no one found to return and to [d]recognize and give thanks and praise to God except this alien?

 And He said to him, Get up and go on your way. Your faith (your trust and confidence that spring from your belief in God) has restored you to health.” (Luke 17:15-19)

Thanking is receiving more. Thanking comes from understanding that the generosity of God is abundant. Thanking is directly linked to healing and restoration.

How has the generosity of God been so gracious to you? How can you, today, say, “Thank You”? What do you need to go about asking God for this very moment?

Prayer: (Take it from here…)

Honoring Your Husband

we all want

This Facebook message stopped me. . .

Sharrona Watson posted on Facebook:

“I used to be a bit hard headed when it came to my husband. Between temper tantrums and straight I DON’T WANT TO HEAR YOU, I was a mess.

Why listen to him when I can listen to myself? Besides, I had this subconscious belief that my Holy Spirit was much “Holy-ER” than his.  I know I’m not the only wife that has felt this way.

God started dealing with me…

I woke up one day and the side of my face was a lil swollen. I knew it had something to do with a tooth. No biggie, pop a few motrins & antibiotics I should be good to go on this women’s retreat I was excited to go on.

Why on earth did Randy say “no”? He wanted me to go to Urgent Care. And miss my trip??? gosh darnit, that strong-willed being in me wanted to fight, but I knew I needed to listen.

I went to Urgent Care…. they immediately sent me to the Emergency Room, my face tripled in size and the pain was so severe. They immediately took me back and sprung into action, cutting open my gums. They used this tool that extracted a large amount of infection from me. It was painful. The E.R doctor told me had I not gone in the infection could have gone to my brain as well as shut my airway — both could have resulted in my death. Can you imagine me getting to heaven and the Lord saying “All you needed to do was listen to Randy”?

Submitting to our husband’s can save our lives. Whether it be physical, mental, spiritual etc… Sometimes they KNOW MORE THAN US!!”

This post made me think… Do I honor my husband’s wisdom or do I think my wisdom is best? Do I know what I’m doing or do I hear his heart? Do I heed his advice or go my own way?

Various times, my husband’s wisdom has felt off-putting…offensive, even.

Once he told me to “keep quiet”, as it pertained to a specific issue. But, I didn’t want to keep quiet, I wanted — TO SPEAK! Yet, it was only after following his wisdom that something amazing happened: by keeping my mouth shut, God opened a door. A major door.

God’s ways are not our ways. Wisdom doesn’t always sound like our voice or outlook. Yet, that doesn’t mean it is trash.  God speaks through people, even husbands.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. (Is. 55:8)

We don’t always need to understand — before we trust. We don’t have to make sense of everything — before we follow. Who in their right mind can understand the vastness and completeness of God? If you waited to know everything, before following Jesus, you’d be nowhere.

Do you need to trust your husband more? You know, there is no perfect husband, but we do serve a perfect God who defends, who protects and who leads. We can trust our Maker, to make our path straight, as we honor our husbands.

I know — doing this — isn’t always easy, so let’s pray…

Prayer: Father, I want to thank you for Sharrona Watson’s post on Facebook. It reminded me that I don’t know it all. I don’t have every answer. I don’t know my own way all the time. Thank you, God, that you have united me together with my husband, on purpose and for a purpose. When we are in unity, there is power in that. Please teach me, Father, what it is to honor and to submit to my husband’s wisdom. Please help me to trust you, when I do this. I want to learn  to honor you by honoring him.  Thank you, God, that I am growing in relationship and marriage. Thank you God, that you will help me. Thank you God, that I am not defenseless. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

I was going to put Sharrona’s bio and picture here…but you know what? Instead, let’s pray for her!

Prayer for Sharrona: Father, please grant Sharrona the deep desires of hear heart. Father, we pray for breakthrough in her life, as she is calling out for. Hear our prayer today. We ask for swift answers. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Down, But Not Out.

good father

Do you feel down? Maybe you are pressed on every side by worries or fear? Maybe you are flustered by what is happening all around you? Maybe people are not being agreeable or hopeful?

We’ve all been there… Life has hard times. Certain days, the pain is potent, the tears are heavy and hope feels flimsy.

Paul, the apostle, understood hardship. Paul, after the resurrection of Jesus, received lashes upon lashes. He was beaten with rods. He was pelted with stones. He was 3 times shipwrecked. He was constantly on the move. He was “in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my fellow Jews, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false believers”. (2 Cor. 11:26)  He “labored and toiled” and went “without sleep”. He knew “hunger and thirst” and went “without food.” He was “cold and naked.” (2 Cor. 11:27-28) 

Yet, Paul kept going…
Yet, Paul kept believing…
Yet, Paul kept enduring…

…all by the grace of God. It’s amazing isn’t it?

This is the power of our God to sustain us, to keep us, to help us keep going. If He did it for Paul — He can do it for us. If He did it for me (when I felt like giving up on life, when I felt like quitting), He can do it for us.

Where do you need God’s help to keep going?

My friend, no matter what we face today — no matter how bad it looks — Christ offers strength to overcome. Christ grants power to keep going. Christ has a plan of escape. Christ is The Door and The Way. Just as Paul made it through we overcome as trust Christ for the victory.

The Author and The Perfector of our faith is always authoring and perfecting our life, our hearts and our path. He knows. Crooked pictures become craft projects in His hands. Suddenly, through His finishing, something new is created, only it is 1000x better than before.

God makes all things beautiful in HIS time. (see: Ec. 3:11)

We see a mess; He sees opportunity. We see annoyance; He sees new patience growing. We see long roads; He sees endurance and perseverance in our lives like never before. I believe, God treasures our heart  more than our immediate demands. The wonder is, He usually takes care of those demands too, in the long run. This is what I’ve found, at least.

He’s never once let me down. He’s brought me through an eating disorder, depression, illness, health scares, relationship drama, fear, control and so much more. He shows up. His power has been enough to save me time-and-time again. He is that wonderful.

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair;  persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.”  (2 Cor. 4:8-12 NIV)

We will make it as we trust Him. We will stand strong as we lean on Him. We will come out the other side, better, stronger and wiser as we stay in His love. No, we will not be forsaken. Never. He loves us.

Prayer: Father, pour out your love on every reader, in profound ways. Let every person know how much you care. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Use Your Voice

good father

I was too tired. “I can’t. Not now, my dear.”

Have you ever been so tired by night’s end you can’t do a solitary thing, but plop on your bed?

My daughter wanted me to wash her knotted-up hair at the sink. It’s a big ordeal. Although I wanted to help her, I knew if I said yes, I also risked being in a horrid mood and things ending up 100o times worse.

“I can’t, my love.”

“But mom. . . ” she persisted.

“I can’t.”

“But, you can. The knots at the back of my neck hurt me when I sleep,” she replied.

She was pulling at my heartstrings now. I didn’t want to her to be uncomfortable; I care for her. I want to help her. I love her.

You know, God loves us the same way. He hears our repeated requests. He understands our difficult position. He is moved by our asking — be it for little or big things. Don’t give up making your heart known to God and your voice heard. He cares for you…

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.” (Mt. 7:7-8)

Just as my daughter kept asking by, persistent asking, opens something up. I believe our repeated asking, using our voice, must move God’s heart, similar to how it moved mine. It’s hard to say no, to one you really love. It’s hard to say no, when the one you love so wants your help. It’s hard to back away when the sound of your child, moves you.

God loves us too. He showcases His love by how He sent His very own son, for us, even while we were yet sinners. If God did that for us, how much more does He want to help us?

His heart isn’t to abandon us, but to help us.

Eventually, I told my daughter, “Yes, I’ll help you!”

I answered her request not because it was easiest for me, but because I had compassion for her situation (and, well, she kept asking using that persistent voice). At the same time, I answered a little different than she expected. All the same, her end goal was accomplished.

And, isn’t this how God works with us?” We say, “I want my hair washed at the sink!” He nearly says, “Well, after you take a shower, then I’ll come with the de-tangler.”

Our part is obedience. His part is faithfulness.

Has God asked you to do something? Do you feel called to move a certain direction on an issue? Don’t ignore those nudges. Follow them.

Simple acts of obedience often opens up answered prayers through persistence. But, we must get going and keep knocking — and not give up!

Don’t get discouraged by what you haven’t seen or what you aren’t seeing. God hears. And, if like me, you forget to pray at times — that’s okay too. God never despises a small beginning. In fact, that’s how all great things begin. Just start. Just ask. Know He loves you. God IS love! He wants what is best for you. He cares. He IS Provider too. That means — He is faithful.

Make your heart and voice known to God, for He cares for you.

Prayer: Father, thank you that you hear us. You really do! You love us too. We are so thankful to be loved by a good father. You are always ready to help. You may do things different than we think, but in the end you know what is good for us. We thank you for this. Your timing is right, even if we can’t always understand. Father? Will you help us in the way we need today — (ask specifics here)? We lift this up with great expectation of your help. You are Faithful and True. You are a rescuing God. You are Deliverer. Your ways are so far greater than ours. We love you. We thank you. In Jesu’s name. Amen.

Take Down the Enemy

good father

My husband and I have been off. It’s not that we’re having huge arguments, it is just that when I say red, he says yellow. When I pray one way, he feels led the other. When I am think about one thing, I interrupt him before he can speak the other.

Ever been there?

Over the years, we’ve learned the value in praying for “unity in the Spirit” and “the bond of peace”.  The more we press after this, the more breakthrough we get.

“Always be humble and gentle. Patiently put up with each other and love each other. Try your best to let God’s Spirit keep your hearts united. Do this by living at peace.” (Eph. 4:2-3)

We can never forget, no matter what relationship we are in — that there is a real enemy who is diabolically opposed to one thing: love. His aim is to steal peace to kill unity and, ultimately, to destroy love.  If he can do this in our relationships, he can sabotage our life.

Without prayer, we go defenseless. With it, and by using the Sword of the Spirit (the Word of God), we defeat enemy attacks and schemes in their tracks.

If we find ourself in an argument with someone, or carrying offense, or getting annoyed — one of the wisest things you can do is pray.

There have been various times that I knew the way my husband should go, but I didn’t tell these things to him. Instead, I prayed. Eventually, God led my husband the answer. It’s always better when people hear from God.

Never forget, there is power in your prayer. You can move a mountain. David took down a Goliath with just 5 smooth stones. These weren’t huge boulders. They weren’t large rocks. They were, small, smooth stones. I imagine they fit in his hand.

If David could take down giant Goliath with 1 smooth stone, how much more can our new covenant, grace-empowered prayers take down problems in our lives?

“The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” (Ja. 5:16)

This blog has a testimony of answered prayers. There have been times that we’ve prayed over all the readers, together, and testimonies have come in. What if we do it again? We are more than just vague people on the internet. We are a body of believers, the body of Christ.

Prayer: Father, we thank you that you know the need of every reader of this post. Father God, we also thank you that you reign, rule and you are in control of all things. We honor you, and you alone as our God. We also ask that you meet the deep desires and inner requests of people’s hearts on this blog. We pray for your highest and best for each person reading. We ask that as we pray for others and for our needs that prayer-testimonies come through. Great is your faithfulness! Great is your wonder-working power. Great are you, Oh Lord, and worth to be praised. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

 

How to Handle Mean People

God's love

“You’re not included.”

Well, this isn’t exactly what she said to me, but it felt that way.

Worst of all, this wasn’t the first this woman had excluded me and, as I’d come to know later that day, it wouldn’t be the last time, either. Grr.

When I got home, I thought, “I hate that lady.” She was rude to push me out, to set me aside. And, now she was acting was ungodly. I guess she is just an unhappy person…and, it seems — unthoughtful and untrustworthy.

Mean thoughts kept coming, until God broke in.

God stopped me. I knew my heart wasn’t right, but I didn’t know how to stop the avalanche of mean things I felt inside.

Yet, Jesus.  “Jesus came not to condemn the world, but to save it.” (see Jo. 3:17)

If Jesus came — not to condemn, but to save, shouldn’t I come that way too? This got me to thinking…

What would it look like me for me to save my judgment so I could love, rather than hate? If Jesus saved me, rather than holding me to every past mistake, shouldn’t I also forgive this passive-aggressive woman too?

Doing this was going to be hard, but I knew: Either the Word of God would take hold of my heart or anger at man would.

What would I do? Certainly, I didn’t want a bitter root to grow within me. So, I decided to forgive her.

You see, I’ve had moments of insecurity – where I felt unsure or uneasy, but still, God and others decided to stick with me. I’ve made mistakes in my tone of voice and, still, God still kept me. I’ve been hurt and wanted to take that out on others (in fact, I still do this at times) and God lets me start again.

In so many ways, I have been this woman too. It was never the condemnation or unforgiveness that changed me – it was the grace, and space to grow, that made room for transformation. I want to afford this woman this room too.

If I’ve learned one thing over my short life, it is this: We are most free, when we forgive. Why? Because we love instead of hate. Clearing out ungodly emotions makes room for God’s goodness, hope, and restoration. Here, if called to do so, we can minister from a pure heart, rather than an angry one.  I know this process may feel hard.

In fact, it feels hard for me too, especially as it pertains to this woman. Yet, freedom, for me, has been deciding — I don’t have to choose her as my best friend. In this, I can love her, pray for her, smile at her — with some wise distance between us. Love doesn’t always have to put itself back in the boxing ring again, the way it did last time.

I bless her. I hope the best for her. But, she will not be my nearest and dearest friend…

I feel happier now. I am not out of control; I am in God’s love.

Who have you been judging, accusing or condemning? Who might you need to stop hating so you can start loving them — if even from a distance?

Prayer: Father, I feel hurt. I feel angry. I am asking you to forgive me for the anger and hatred that I’m feeling. I am also asking that you give me grace to forgive this person who has offended me. I want to love again. In this, I choose to forgive ___ for ___. I let them go right now to you, Father. I know that you are the best Father. I ask you to show me whether I need to talk to this person, pray for them or love them from a distance. Give me wisdom. I let go of all my offense. I thank you for helping me in this. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

The Best Offense is Defense

we all want

My new house has a blueberry bush. Through our living room window, I see ripening berries. When they get a perfect blue hue, then I’ll know it is time to pluck them off. Yet, there’s one problem to my hypothetical dream…

Birds. Pesky little birds keep stealing my fruit. When I see a berry all blue and ready-to-eat, a bird comes along, sits on a branch – and pluck! My luscious berry is gone. In a split-second, my ripe fruit is stolen right off the vine.

This situation happens in our spiritual life too. Many of us have ripening fruit in our life (God is growing real things), yet there is an enemy who wants to steal our ripening fruit. This can happen without us realizing it.

God is growing patience, yet we fall into self-defeat when an event triggers. We say, “Why bother trying!?”

God is growing endurance, yet a test comes and we figure our pain will never end. “Things will never get better.”

God is growing our love for another, yet a horrible situation happens where, it seems, the person shows no signs of changing. “God won’t really do this.”

The enemy steals fruit when we believe lies. The lies are usually: Things will never change. I am bad, guilty and will never be better (because of this mess-up). God will not come through for me (or them).

Where is the enemy plucking God’s fruit in our lives?

Just because God is allowing us to go through something, doesn’t mean he isn’t doing something, or growing something in us.

“The seed that fell on the footpath represents those who hear the message about the Kingdom and don’t understand it. Then the evil one comes and snatches away the seed that was planted in their hearts.” (Matthew 13:19, NLT).

More than hearing truth is understanding it — where we go about living it. More than knowing a bible verse is having it lay claim to our life. More than seeing a problem is understanding God will show up. Are we only hearing God-stuff or are we understanding that it applies to us?

Remember, Jesus is Teacher. He doesn’t waste problems; He teaches real things through them. . .

It matters less what you know, or what you recite by rote-memory, and far more — what you truly understand in your heart.

A true defense against the enemy starts in our hearts.

As it pertains to that blueberry bush, I took action. After some research, I wrapped aluminum foil around part of the bush to repel pesky fruit eaters.

And, it worked.

Now when I look out my window, I not only see luscious, ripe fruit but I now eat of that fruit. Yet, in order to keep the fruit, I had to stop the enemy in his tracks. I had to set up a defense.

We must do the same — by setting up a defense…

How? We: resist. We resist sneak attacks by taking care of ourselves when we’re tired, hungry, or lonely. We can resist defeat and discouragement by turning on worship music and singing from our heart. We resist becoming a victim when we remember we truly are who God says we are . We resist going downhill when we allow God’s grace (because of Jesus) lift us up again.

When we resist, then we persist – in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, and self-control.

Prayer: Dear Lord, I want to learn from you. I want to grow in true fruitfulness and in understanding. I want to be taught by you. I pray that the enemy of my soul may have no access to my heart, soul, mind or spirit. I pray that I can believe the truth in all things, in all ways and at all times by your grace. I pray that I will trust you to provide and to take care of me. I want you above all else. You are my greatest pursuit. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

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