hope Archives - Page 27 of 57

The One Thing We Must Always Return To

July 13, 2017

grace, Regular Contributor, relationships

I was out-of-my-mind frustrated.

He had spewed mean words to his younger siblings too many times that day. We had talked. And talked. And prayed. Well, I had prayed. There’s no telling if he prayed along. This battle had been brewing a while, and I was over it.

So I sent him to his room, thinking I needed a few minutes to cool down before I could deal with his most recent outburst {in a calm manner}.

Unfortunately, I didn’t leave it there. I followed him, giving him an ugly earful of my own thoughts and feelings about the situation he created and the ways he was ruining my day.

I dealt with his outbursts by having an outburst of my own. And then I left his room with a sigh and that rotten feeling.

This is not the way I plan to, hope to, want to parent. But it’s the way I sometimes do.

As I walked down the hallway, the phone in my pocket chirped. I pressed the home button, only to be greeted by the Verse of the Day. Oh, shoot. I had just signed up to receive these verses as a text each day, but it had to arrive right then?

1 Corinthians 13:2 brightened up my screen.

“If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.”

If I do not have love? Of course I have love for my kids. But I wasn’t acting in love. During the course of that challenging day, my thoughts had shifted to me. Instead of acting in love, I focused on how I felt like a victim of my child’s nasty behavior.

So I asked God to help me, to move toward this boy with love.

My son quickly softened at my apology, and he asked for my forgiveness as well. It doesn’t always happen that way, but this time it did. We talked for a while, and as I listened to the way he viewed things, I began to see him with different eyes. Love does that for us, doesn’t it?

Love helps us see through the lens of compassion. It reminds us that everyone, even the kid currently mistreating his siblings, is struggling in their own ways. I’m not excusing the behavior, just handling it with compassion.

I hope to love well, not only as a Mom but in every relationship. So I’ll keep on asking for supernatural help and listen for God’s voice–even if His words come through and afternoon text from the Bible app.

Love makes all the difference. It’s the one thing we must always return to.

Angela Parlin is a wife and mom to 3 rowdy boys and 1 sweet girl. In addition to spending time with friends and family, she loves to read and write, spend days at the beach, watch romantic comedies, and organize closets. But most of all, she loves Jesus and writes to call attention to the beauty of life in Christ, even when that life collaborates with chaos. Join her at www.angelaparlin.com, So Much Beauty In All This Chaos.

Alarm: You Need Help & It is Okay

July 11, 2017

purposefulfaith

attack, awe, Contentment, dreams

16 Comments

We have a broken fire alarm in our house. It’s either that, or well working. At the first hint of bacon, or scents of meat or scorch in a pan the thing fires off.

At first, we freaked. We didn’t know whether, with this obnoxious sound, we should run outside to grab a hose or just sit around and chill out. But, after the 11th or so time, we realized – all will be okay. We just have to address the issue and move on with our day.

Some of us, need to do the same: We need to hear a fire alarm sounding in our mind, address the issue with God and know it will be okay.

What fire alarm should be sounding off in your life? Is it harsh words? Is it a mean attitude? Is it a shut-down heart? Is it a busy lifestyle? Is it a spending habit?

Usually, we try to go through our house, our life, acting like everything is okay when it really is not. This is not okay. We need to hear that fire alarm, the sound of God reminding us – Hey, look over here, there are some things you need to address. There are some areas that I want you to see, so you can better see me.

It is not a sound of condemnation, it is a sound of restoration, meant to bring us to Jesus’ consolation. Jesus loves us. He wants to help us. He is for us. He is with us. He is our advocate. He is our relief. He is our way. He is our life.

Why not let him heal us from what hurts today? Why not call out to him, instead of trying to soldier on with bandages around our knees and a limp to your spirit? We were meant for more than this kind of living, weren’t we?

You’re not faking him; I am not either.

And, even though I try to “fake it” in my house, today I admit: My heart feels fragile. It feels needy. It feels wanting. I am a little weary.

But, no weight is not too much for God to carry.

In fact, renewed power and passion comes to types like me and you, who admit need. For, with Christ, our weakness becomes our strength. We need not feel ashamed to abide in the place of wanting, of longing and of helplessness. Here, he who is help, brings help, speedily. He rescues us. He rushes in. He saves.

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” (Ps. 34:18)

Be not ashamed if there is an alarm sounding in your life; he who saves will show up.

Kelly’s new book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears has been called “A must read,” “Breathtakingly honest” and a “Great Toolbox to Overcome Fear.” Read it today.

Discover how to flee from fear and fly in faith through 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

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How to Go Easy On Yourself

July 7, 2017

purposefulfaith

attack, blessings, Contentment, doubt, fear

2 Comments

Does your mind hone in on what you do wrong, more often what God is doing right?

Maybe you’re quick to notice your quick temper, the error of all your past ways — your choices, your parenting style, your marriage mannerisms. Or, maybe you’ve made some horrible financial decisions and found yourself at a loss. Usually, there is an area in our lives we hate; sometimes it is our thighs.

We are good at circling problem areas and critiquing them. Somehow, as women, we give ourselves permission to whine to each other. We think, it’s fine to share our worst, don’t brag about your best though.

So, we do. And, we learn to do this in our mind too.

I hate that I hate playing silly games with my kids. I don’t listen well either. I always give in to my kids. They always, nearly get what they want. Oh, I’ve been afraid to do spankings. I have a whole list of things I can improve on; I am aware of them.

I think of them as often as I think about what to eat next. They are a record of wrongs that follows me. Which is why, I needed some reprieve from them. And, fortunately, I found it.

I was in the kitchen, 6-year old so came in and said, “Hey Mommy, earlier, I almost ate the box of cookies in the pantry, but then I didn’t.”

I laughed it off.

The next day, he looked at me and said, “Mommy, I almost pulled all the toilet paper off the roll, but then I didn’t.”

And, it was at this point that wisdom hit me like a hammer: I can choose to see what I am not doing, or I can choose to see how I am improving. By focusing on how I am improving I remember important things.

I remember:

I am being sanctified, upgraded day-by-day, into the image of Christ (1 Cor. 6:11).
I am moving from glory to glory (2 Cor. 3:8).
I am growing (Ro. 8:29).

We can’t look at a day and demand of it what God is doing over a year. I felt peace land on me. I felt peace land on my son as I looked on him with proud eyes. And, I imagined how God must look on me, when I try, when I improve and when I ease up on myself.

Kelly’s new book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears has been called “A must read,” “Breathtakingly honest” and a “Great Toolbox to Overcome Fear.” Read it today.

Discover how to flee from fear and fly in faith through 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

Seeds Planted

July 6, 2017

Jami Amerine

birth, blessings, Contentment, expectations

2 Comments

My friend Bev Sheasby of Liberated Living Ministries has been helping me limp across the finish line of a very hard season. She says wise and beautiful things that come at just the right moment. Words of affirmation, wisdom, and encouragement. She’s been such a comfort to me.

We recently had the loving privilege of handing our long-term foster daughter back into her birthmother’s restored arms.

Simultaneously, our oldest son became a Marine.

That same week, our oldest daughter eloped. This was a blessing, we are thrilled for the happy couple. But it has just been one thing after another.

And then another.

We welcomed an injured foster placement that same week. I may be a glutton for punishment, but actually, she has been a delightful distraction. It’s an honor to care for her.

Still, sending adult children off into the great beyond, I wonder… was it enough? Did I teach them everything they needed to know?

And I am not of the mindset that the Jesus I love was wholly made theirs simply by my prose. Scripture memory, “Jesus Loves Me,” and “Larry and the Giant Cucumber” are a start, He will have to take them to the finish.

But what about these “temporary” sons and daughters? There’s a chance they’ll hardly remember me? Let alone the whispered prayers or the lullabies of a Jesus who adored them, unto His death. I panicked, not so much in a lapse of faith, but a lack of confidence – a state of weariness. That sinking feeling, you know the one, where you feel you must be everything to everyone, every second of every day.

And something Bev said came into my mind, as I let some tears fall and whispered some small, but heartfelt prayers for healing.

“Within the seed is the potential for the entire plant.”

In my quest to provide for all, I realize what I often forget is how very small I am. Barely a seed myself, yet I think I must do it all and be all and fix all.

Alas, if I planted an apple seed, I could water it – but would it be me that would turn it into a tree? Would I be responsible for ensuring it produces a harvest? Could I even accomplish this? Even if I wanted to?

Furthermore, if I planted an apple seed and then I moved to a different farm in another state and left it to the elements, would it not be watered by the sky? Fed by the sun? And pruned by the wind? Isn’t it completely likely, aside from placing the seed in the earth, the earth would take care of the rest?

Within the seed is the potential for the entire plant. My comfort and rest come from this. I will continue to plant the seed and trust the Maker of all to finish the rest.

“The Lord will send a blessing on your barns and on everything you put your hand to. The Lord your God will bless you in the land he is giving you.” Deuteronomy 28:8 (NIV)

Jami Amerine is a wife, and mother to anywhere from 6-8 children. Jami and her husband Justin are active foster parents and advocates for foster care and adoption. Jami’s Sacred Ground Sticky Floors is fun, inspirational, and filled with utter lunacy with a dash of hope. Jami holds a degree in Family and Consumer Sciences (yes Home Ec.) and can cook you just about anything, but don’t ask her to sew. She also holds a Masters Degree in Education, Counseling, and Human Development. Her blog includes topics on marriage, children, babies, toddlers, learning disabilities, tweens, teens, college kids, adoption, foster care, Jesus, homeschooling, unschooling, dieting, not dieting, dieting again, chronic illness, stupid people, food allergies, and all things real life. You can find her blog at Sacred Ground Sticky Floors, follow her onFacebook or Twitter.

How to Fess Up

July 5, 2017

purposefulfaith

Contentment, devil, doubt, fear, God, grace

1 Comment

I am horrible at fessing up. Maybe you are too.

Here’s why I think we hate to do it:

We feel so guilty.
We don’t want to bring attention to it.
We would rather pretend it didn’t happen.
We are embarrassed.
We hate to admit we aren’t perfect.

It’s number 5 that really gets me; I try so hard to be perfect, so to break the porcelain veneer is like dropping grandma’s ancient heirloom. I feel crushed. I feel caught. I feel like someone might want to yell in my face.

Yet, when my son started pointing fingers at everyone else but himself. When he couldn’t admit doing things wrong. . . well, all fingers pointed back at me. I can’t blame on him, what he learns from me. He’s really just a reflection of the environment that I create for him.

I declared it was high-time I start to change something – about me. And, sooner rather than later. It is far easier to say you want to change than it ever is to actually do it.

I still tried. I noticed when I got that little prick of anxiety in my heart and admitted why: I pushed a little too hard on my husband to get my way. I paid attention to the small sense of guilt I previously ignored and acknowledged my wrong: I brought up a sensitive topic at the worst time. I looked at my child’s face when I chided with too much force and reacted: I am sorry.

Nope. And, I wasn’t perfect. Sometimes, my pride inhibited my humility. Pride made me take an hour, where humility would have shown up right away. But, I am learning: it is a learning process.

Sometimes, the act of being honest with yourself is the first act. You have to cheer yourself on for this. I am doing this. YAY!

Maybe you need to join me? Have you built up defenses so high even you can’t see over them to the truth? Have you found that you don’t ever want to be wrong.

This verse has been such an encouragement to me: “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.” (1 Pet. 5:6)

I used to think an apology meant I needed to go dwell in a dumpster or something. Now I see an apology is a welcome by God to a higher place with him. It is my letting go so that I can welcome his glory and peace in. When I do this, I find my way back to his heart more easily.

I go low. God brings me high.

Kelly’s new book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears has been called “A must read,” “Breathtakingly honest” and a “Great Toolbox to Overcome Fear.” Read it today.

Discover how to flee from fear and fly in faith through 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

Give a Lift to Your Heart

July 3, 2017

purposefulfaith

blessings, Contentment, doubt, faith

1 Comment

At church, I was feeling unmotivated. Call it one of those mornings: you drive into the church lot with a frown on your face, kids screaming up a storm an, an argument brewing. It’s frustrating.

That’s where I was.

Once in the service, worship started, and I worried: I am not feeling this. I feel far. Disconnected. Demotivated. Blah.

My mind bounced to different topics like: I haven’t heard her sing before. I like how she smiles so big when she sings. I wonder if that cross was always on that wall or if they ever had it in the front of the church? Why do they always use that stand when they sing? It can easily tip over. . .

. . . until. . .

. . . a lady, a beautiful, tall and full-bodied hair woman completely interrupted my train of thought. The strength of her voice sounded stronger than the band. She belted out the words to the song, “God is good…so good,” and she belted them loud. She sang “His faithfulness endures forever…” to the rafters.

I wasn’t sure if I should move, hide or shoot her the evil eye. Her voice was moving into my atmosphere of annoyance, and it continued to. Until she shifted my atmosphere of annoyance to one of utter awe: She believes in God that much. She doesn’t care how she looks. She loves her God so much. She has such wild faith in what she is singing.

And, what she put out from her mouth, seemed to land in my heart. I took her strength on as my strength. And, then, I sang with her. And, as I did, as I let her heart encourage mine, I found my own song.

“I once was lost but now am found, Was blind, but now I see…”

I could see 2 things:

Our actions have the ability to lift others up or tear them down. We often don’t realize what an impact we are making, but make an impact, we do, when we pour out love.
We have the ability to lean on the faith of others. If we get near someone strong, their testimony, faith and fervor often rubs off on us. We just have to pick up the phone, send the email or show up on their doorstep for connection.

We need each other. God designed us as – better together. And, this day, I thank God for the lady who knew how to belt out her love to Jesus.

How might you reach out to the world with lyrics that belt out?

Kelly’s new book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears has been called “A must read,” “Breathtakingly honest” and a “Great Toolbox to Overcome Fear.” Read it today.

Discover how to flee from fear and fly in faith through 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

Your Greatest Defense in Life

June 30, 2017

purposefulfaith

blessings, Contentment, doubt, dreams

1 Comment

Backing into my driveway today, from my rear view mirror, I could see the sign planted in the ground adjacent to the garage. It said, “This house is secured by ADT.” I needed this reminder from God. Because, while I might forget it — while I might feel alone, left behind, broken or tired, the truth is: I have personal security. And, so do you.

We all walk secured and protected by God: He holds our hand, He keeps our foot from slipping, He gives us his name, His strong tower and He always defends us.

“The LORD himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.” (Ex. 14:14)

We have personal security!

This is a vital truth to remember. It is one to return to often, because, like colanders, we only hold Living Water until the gravity of the world pulls it out.

When empty, we wonder:

Is God good?
Will he really help me?
Do I have what it takes?
How will I ever survive?
Does God really care?

I found myself in this place today: I was drained, discouraged and down in the dumps. Who knows why!

But, I pulled on security. Quiet time with God is my security. It is likely yours too. It is what protects our mind in Christ Jesus.

As I prayer walked, God reminded me:

He can do all things. He created this world; he can create new circumstances.
In the world I might feel weak; but when I walk with him, I am strong.
Appearances mean nothing; his truth and my status as daughter means everything.
He has created me in advance for good works and these good works he will see through.
If I keep coming to God, He’ll keep showing me what to do.

We all have home security. It is called getting alone with him who assures you, you are: 1. safe 2. loved and, 3. His, forever.

In Christ, you cannot be invaded.

Kelly’s new book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears has been called “A must read,” “Breathtakingly honest” and a “Great Toolbox to Overcome Fear.” Read it today.

Discover how to flee from fear and fly in faith through 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

Does God See Me?

June 28, 2017

purposefulfaith

awe, blessings, Contentment, faith

2 Comments

Air conditioning. It is such a beautiful thing, such a wonderful reprieve from sweltering heat. I was glad to be in it and away from the heat that had been dripping down my skin. Plus, we were finally in the car, me and my two toddlers. In my victory place. . . I call it this, because it means I’ve dressed them well, ensuring their underwear are on their bodies and not their heads. It also means I’ve successfully harnessed them in the seats with octopus tentacles, I mean, straps. . .

All this to say, now we could successfully move from point A, home, to point B, camp. I clocked in my speed exactly 5 acceptable miles over the speed limit and fell into my thoughts. How does one find God when life gets moving so fast?

In the morning, before life started going and hustling, I was all rock-solid-in-Christ. In the quiet I was full, sure, readied and bible-loaded. But, then, somewhere into the first 10-minutes of morningtime momma-ing, I was depleted.

I drove on, letting my mind wrap its arms around this ongoing struggle. I’m all alone. I have to do everything myself. Where’s the love for the woman who works so hard? Where’s the replenishment in these places of “worn out”?

My eyes surveyed the flat, long road ahead, all the way down the next 5 stop lights. If I drive a little faster I can make that light. If I switch lanes I can get ahead to do it. If I get the kids unbuckling by the time I hit the parking lot of the school, I can more quickly transition them at the door.

My eyes stared off into the sweltering horizon down the grey asphalt road, but what they never did, at least not for a long time, was – look up. This, I later realized, this was my problem. It often is: I see what is in front of me, missing the God above me. I manage, control, fix, suppose and compound issues. God just waits to be found.

Yet, by shifting my mind to see what’s above I can actually see. In this case, I could see light pink, hot pink, off white and splashes of every color. . . painted accross the sky. God is awesome!

His light reached towards my car.

God does see me.
He is always here.
He knows my situation.
He sees my way.

Encouraged, I searched out more. I noticed the birds. They weren’t all flying around; they were relaxed, sitting and surveying the glory from a phone line. Turned towards the sun. At peace.

Rest is here.
God is rest.
I can choose to rest in him.

His love waits for me.

This situation stood as the perfect reminder: if instead of dwelling on what is in front of me, I dwell on what is above, I will find God as I seek him.

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. (Jer. 29:13)

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. (Mt. 17:7)

Kelly’s new book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears has been called “A must read,” “Breathtakingly honest” and a “Great Toolbox to Overcome Fear.” Read it today.

Discover how to flee from fear and fly in faith through 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

My Gigantic Mistake

June 26, 2017

purposefulfaith

attack, Contentment, doubt, failure, faith, fear

4 Comments

I only wish I could take it back. Why doesn’t life come with a rewind button? Why can’t we re-do those horrible, wretched moments where we just get ahead of our self?

I got lured in. No, I didn’t.
I got pressured. Well, no, actually, I didn’t.
It was an impossible situation. No, to see things plainly, it really wasn’t.
Anyone could have done it. This point really doesn’t justify my action.

Now that my excuses are out of the way, I can name my action for what it is: a gigantic mistake. I can own it: I sinned.

Here’s what happened . . .

I met up with a girlfriend, Jen. Oh, how I love her. Wisdom is all over her. She is someone I can tell anything. Laughing, we enjoyed our time together. We connected, relayed stories and then, at one point, Jen relayed one of her secrets: she didn’t enjoy going to one of our common friend’s, Christy’s, marketing parties.

To me, this was no big deal, but to Jen, as she shared this information, it seemed huge. She quieted her voice, she leaned close, and she told me to keep it between me and her. She had that face on her that said, I just told you something I am SO embarrassed to admit.

Of course, I promised to keep quiet. But, I didn’t. The secret about Jen slipped out while I was talking with Maria, our common friend. And, the “whoopsie moment” was magnified when I realized, Carrie, Jen’s closest friend, was right behind me. Like, RIGHT behind me. She totally could hear.

All I could do was – Panic! I’d messed the whole thing up, horribly. I’d gone – and got myself – caught.

Suddenly, rather than enjoying my place amongst friends, my mistake spun me out into some parallel universe of worry, fear and angst. I’m going to be busted. My friends will never tell me anything ever again. I am horrible. I am now going to be known as a liar.

The sin bothered me, but what was really killing me was the fact: I got caught. It is funny how sin works that way, isn’t it? If we can hide it safely, we figure – no harm, no foul, but if it gets brought to the light we are crushed, tied up and self-tortured for our horrible behavior.

I tortured myself and disallowed my heart from experiencing joy that night.
I tortured myself by rewinding, over and over again, my big mouth blabbing in slow motion.
I tortured myself by trying to pull away from those friends out of embarrassment.
I tortured myself by believing God hated me for a moment.
I tortured myself by thinking my prayers were like paper airplanes missing the target of God.
I tortured myself by not accepting forgiveness.

I didn’t have to do this. I didn’t have to partake in self-torture. You don’t either. Even if you’ve blabbed like me, or thought no good rotten thoughts about your husband or stolen some item from the grocery story. Whatever it is, trying to pierce and plague your heart – you can let it go.

“For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.” Romans 6:14 (NIV)

My friend, you and I both, are under grace. Together we stand, united we will not fall, because Jesus loves us and she who the son sets free, is free indeed (Jo. 8:36). Done. Finalized. Finished.

I am forgiven and you are too. Grace that hung on the cross absolved us from the pain of self sin-torture. Today, let’s receive it and move on.

Kelly’s new book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears has been called “A must read,” “Breathtakingly honest” and a “Great Toolbox to Overcome Fear.” Read it today.

Discover how to flee from fear and fly in faith through 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

Healing an Offense by a Friend

June 23, 2017

purposefulfaith

attack, blessings, Contentment, doubt

2 Comments

She infuriated me. The one I called friend was acting much like foe. She was acting selfish, wrong and mean.

How could you? I thought you cared about me. How did I ever get tricked?

Somehow, I had convinced myself that we were in this thing called life together; yet, her actions silently hand-motioned otherwise. She knew what she was doing. And, she did it anyway.

All I could think, at this point was, I need to boot her out of my life, she can’t be trusted, she is not who I thought she was.

I needed to protect myself. You can’t be friends with women walking with scalpels, can you?

But, God…

Oh, I say that often, because He catches me in my tracks.

But God…he says, love your frenemies: “But love your (fr)enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.” (Luke 6:35)

What frenemy do you need to love?

God inspires me to think a new way towards the offender. I pray I can see the new thought process through.

Take a look:

New thought: That injurer is likely just as injured as I.
My prayer: God, give me strength to love ____ & their weakness. Amen.

New thought: They have their reasons too; I can’t judge their heart.
My prayer: God help me to see their side in the process of all this…

New thought: I need no expectations of man because Jesus met all my expectations on the cross.
My prayer: God, may I truly believe you are – enough.

And, while I might not be ready to talk to her; I am ready to grab God’s hand and start processing it all. Sometimes, just taking this small step towards forgiveness is half the battle.

Kelly’s new book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears has been called “A must read,” “Breathtakingly honest” and a “Great Toolbox to Overcome Fear.” Read it today.

Discover how to flee from fear and fly in faith through 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.