Purposeful Faith

Tag - labels

Exchanging Labels and Lies for His Truth

Blog Post by Abby McDonald

I went to the N.A. meeting with one goal. To get in and get out. The last thing I expected was for someone to give me a new label. I had too many of those already.

Sure, I wanted to support my loved one. I wanted him to get healthy, find release and healing. But I hoped by staying quiet and not making direct eye contact with the group leader, I could make my exit as soon as the meeting was over.

My strategy didn’t exactly work out as planned. The leader saw me right away, as it’s hard not to notice someone new when you’re sitting in a huge circle.

Once he learned who I was, he asked a series of questions. I didn’t know where he was leading and tried to be as vague as possible with my answers. Later, I learned he was trying to see if I met all the criteria for a term commonly used to describe the loved ones of addicts: codependent.

To be honest, I wasn’t sure what the word meant. I had an idea, but I was nineteen years old at the time. Things like this didn’t enter my vocabulary. So, like any good college student, I did some research.

Codependency: (n) a type of dysfunctional helping relationship where one person supports or enables another person’s drug addiction, alcoholism, gambling addiction, poor mental health, immaturity, irresponsibility, or under-achievement.

I wasn’t willing to admit it out loud, but I knew I was a classic case. And without even realizing it, I took this label and added it to the list of other ones I allowed to define me through my college and early work years. Codependent, quiet one, underachiever, shy girl.

What’s ironic is that I hated stereotypes. When others tossed them around, I tried my best to avoid them.

“You can’t put me in a box,” I thought to myself.

What I didn’t see is that even though I wasn’t saying them aloud, I was listening. I was allowing these titles to limit me and hold me back.

When I had the opportunity to read my poetry aloud at the coffee shop, I quietly declined. When my professor told me I should enter a writing piece into the tribune, I let fear hold me back.

Staying in the shadows felt safe.

But by never venturing out and taking risks, I slowly lost little pieces of myself. I watched opportunities pass by and wondered why it was so hard for me to step out and be brave.

Years later, after graduating and acquiring my first couple of post-college jobs, I sat in a sanctuary trembling as the labels I’d adopted fell, one by one. I had new ones, and they weren’t names the world could give or take away.

Chosen. Worthy. Daughter. Beloved.

It took me years of searching and asking questions. Lord knows, I can be pretty hard-headed at times. But what I finally saw is that if I let the world define me with a finite label, I would never know who I was as an eternal being.

The world gives us labels based on appearance, but Jesus gives us names that stick.

Once we realize this, we can walk in freedom because we know that when he calls us to do something, it is his name we represent. Not our own.

So if he if he calls us to speak or share or move, what do we have to lose? Nothing but chains, dear daughters. Nothing but chains.

“My beloved spoke and said to me, “Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, come with me.” Song of Solomon 2:10 ESV

 

Abby McDonald is the mom of three, a wife and writer whose hope is show readers their identity is found in Christ alone, not the noise of the world. When she’s not chasing their two boys or cuddling their newest sweet girl, you can find her drinking copious amounts of coffee while writing about her adventures on her blog. Abby would love to connect with you on her blog and her growing Facebook community.

Who You Are In the Light

identity who you are in the light

Post By: Angela Parlin

Do you know who you really are?

A friend told me recently that her Mom used to have her stand in front of the mirror and recite truths about who God says she is. Isn’t that great? I’ll save it in my parenting toolbox, but the truth is, I’ve needed it myself.

Not long ago, I knew certain facts regarding who God says I am—but I didn’t feel like they were true.

Have you been there?

There’s an identity crisis, within the church. It begins with our understanding of God, and our understanding of who we are in light of Him.

We can name details about God, but do we really know Him?

And if we don’t KNOW the God who created us,
then how do we know our own selves?

I grew up in the church, so I learned numerous truths about God and about myself through the years. I also live in a world where I heard an abundance of lies about us both. There were those labels people gave me, those labels I gave myself, and the experiences that told me things I couldn’t forget.

But more often, I was oblivious to what was going on around me. The world and the devil did their thing, and I failed to see the false and fiery arrows shot my way.

While my foundation was forming,
the enemy worked to confuse my identity.

I didn’t know deep down in my heart who I really was–because of Jesus Christ. I didn’t live confidently out of the truth.

When you don’t have a firm grasp on who you are in God’s eyes (your identity in Christ)—
start with who God is.

Find Him in the quiet. Seek Him through His Word. Get to know Him more.

Meditate on who God is. Focus on who He says you are.

Look to the Word–not to the world–for daily affirmations.

Let Him change your view of Him and your view of you.

Let Him set you free from the lies that hold you down.

In time, God will transform your mind completely, giving you a whole new view.

You will understand who God is and who you are in light of Him.

May these scriptures be a starting place, pointing the way to the truth.

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him and He helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise Him. Psalm 28:7

The Spirit of God has made me; the breath of the Almighty gives me life. Job 33:4

Before I was born, the Lord called me; from my mother’s womb He has spoken my name. Isaiah 49:1b

She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me.” Genesis 16:13a

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light. 1 Peter 2:9

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Angela Parlin

Angela Parlin is Dan’s wife and Mom to 3 rowdy boys and 1 sweet girl. In addition to spending time with friends and family, she loves to read and write, spend days at the beach, watch romantic comedies, and organize closets. But most of all, she loves Jesus and writes to call attention to the beauty of life in Christ, even when that life collaborates with chaos. Join her each week at www.angelaparlin.com, So Much Beauty in All This Chaos.