The lady was confident. That was my first issue with her.
If she was just beautiful and – not confident, she might not have bothered me. But, she was SO sure of herself. She knew she was made of. No one in the world could tell her otherwise! No one could stop her! She brought her brilliance with her wherever she went!
She sat like the statue of liberty. I was a small seagull whose job was to soak in her glory.
It didn’t help she had a great job and wouldn’t shut up about it. That really irked me, because at this time, I had a horrible job and I loved to whine about it. I have too much work! I can’t do it! I need a new job!
This lady spoke to my husband differently: My job is a dream! My boss is inspirational. My life is fantastic!
Puh-lease….someone pass me the salt shaker – so I can pour it on her head.
I could almost see it, me – the small one, salt-shaker in hand – wrecking her moment. Her, the large-and-in-charge one melting like the Wicked Witch of the West.
But, she is not wicked. I am. Ever asked yourself…Why am I thinking this way?
I sat back in my chair, tuned out her conversation and considered – why am I thinking so – meanly?
Her strength is depleting mine.
Her success is ruining my moment.
Her great attitude defines me as less than.
Her belief in herself is stealing my joy.
Why does one woman have such a great impact – on me? Can 1 lady take away all of God’s promises with 1 sparkly super-white smile?
Is this what God intended? For me to hate girls who are happy, successful and beautiful?
Somehow, in this moment, I know my heart has followed a rabbit trail – straight away from God’s glory. I’ve gone got myself stuck in a pit now.
Have you found yourself in a pit lately? Perhaps someone shines better than you? Always has a perfect answer? Has the job of all jobs? Is PTA mom extraordinaire? Is driving your dream car? Has perfect kids? Constantly shows off Facebook vacations?
God says, our pits are escapable, with his help. “He lifted me out of the slimy pit…he set my feet on a rock & gave me a firm place to stand.”
God has the strength to lift me up from the yuck I put myself in.
When I set my eyes on God, not her, he, like a medivac, pulls me to safety.
Choose to stand upon the solid rock – the ground that is not sinking. , that is not wavering and that will not quake under the pressure of earthly measures.
Here, I see: I am not less than, I am just right in God’s eyes.
I am not struggling, but victorious, because I am chosen as daughter.
I am not without a plan, because God has created good works for me in advance. I am not alone, for God sees the desires of my heart.
I am not dependent on others, but fully dependent on God – and who he says I am.
I pull out of my thoughts and find myself at that restaurant table. Her voice emerges, except it no longer sounds like nails on a chalkboard, but another girl, who’s excited to be who she is created to be. I mention how blessed she is to have a good job. She smiles. We talk – and have fun.
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18 CommentsLeave a comment
Thanks so much for writing your heart out so transparently friend. We all have jealous thoughts, but few of us are open enough or humble enough to share it with others.
This is so true, and I really hate when I catch myself looking at someone else like that! There are days we just have to keep God’s truth on repeat …even more that usual!
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We magnify God before others when we proclaim that he has not made a limited supply of “good.” Thanks for this reminder that someone else’s success in no way minimizes my own!
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Love this. So easy for many of us to relate, Kelly.
Gosh—what good timing with this post. I know we shouldn’t compare, but it’s so hard not to!
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We’re so good at comparing ourselves and then blaming the other person. No wonder God told us to avoid comparisons. Thanks for sharing what we’ve all felt! Blessings and thanks for hosting!
I love how you say “I pull out of my thoughts and…” Taking those thoughts captive is hard work but so beneficial to us.
Celebrating the gifts in others frees us to be who God calls us to be. Comparing just keeps us bound.
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Yep! I do this. Thank you for the reminder of whose I am! Perfect and beloved in His eyes!
I have been there too….far more often than I’d care to admit! Envy is a plague, and if we aren’t careful, it will eat through us and leave us less than whole.
so funny in a horrible sort of truth-way! i spent some time on the confession mat this very morning with some of those thoughts. i came up with: I repent of not only envy and jealousy but a lack of faith that God knows best, provides all, and I’m not very thankful! (so there.) God forgave, again. And I continue to beg Him to prick my conscience when I have these thoughts. Our identity is in Christ and that is enough.
PS And good writing by you, besides! happy Tuesday!
Very inspiring message! I needed to read this today.
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